


All the feels

by Shivanessa



Series: Connor becoming Human [1]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Androids, Connor learns about sex, Detroit, Deviant Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Feelings, Hank Anderson & Connor Friendship, Inexperienced Connor, Ken Doll Android Anatomy | Androids Have No Genitalia (Detroit: Become Human), Licking, M/M, Oral Sex, Post-Pacifist Best Ending (Detroit: Become Human), Team Bonding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-05
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:46:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 27
Words: 32,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24024541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shivanessa/pseuds/Shivanessa
Summary: After the peaceful revolution humanity and androids start over, but this does not go without some bumps in the road. For Connor that means that he faces a whole new world of emotions he has to sort out and process. And a lot of those focus on the captain of the SWAT team he works with.
Relationships: Captain Allen/Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Hank Anderson & Connor
Series: Connor becoming Human [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1879105
Comments: 158
Kudos: 87





	1. Waiting

**Author's Note:**

> Most of this story is about Connor becoming more and more human aka he deals with feels and new experiences.

**September, 11th, 2039**

The rain that had been a promise hidden in dark grey clouds looming on the horizon all day now pressed against the windows, the howling wind almost drowning out the loud patter of water against glass. Deep rumbling moved closer, the distance between the lightning and thunder melting together. Behind the window the room was dim, not a single light competed with the lighting and the watery shine of the street lamps. It wasn't night yet but it could just as well be. 

A person sat on a simple chair, the hands relaxed on the knees, feet flat on the ground, the back straight as a rod. Unmoving like a statue. 

Connor's eyes were closed, his face relaxed. 

He felt the vibrations of the thunder outside the building in his core as much as the growing amount of electricity in the air. He listened to the rain, the wind and the veiled sounds of the city, submerging himself in the sensations. 

This was what being alive was about. Sensations. 

Since he had opened his eyes for real, he could not get enough. It was an addiction of sorts and a part of his processor calculated endlessly if it could become a problem. But to sit back and listen to the rain should not affect him negatively, shouldn't it? 

A machine did not feel. 

A machine received data and processed it. 

But a being _experienced_. 

And experience Connor sought. 

Even if that led him down unknown paths and into completely unexpected directions. 

At least his model was created to deal with strange situations. 

His fine senses caught on familiar steps in the hallway, hasty and unnerved, marching from the elevator to the apartment's door. The steps of a man who knew who he was, what he wanted from life and what his purpose was. And who now had been caught by surprise by the thunderstorm, despite the forecast predicting the rain for days. 

Connor's lips turned upward when rustling of a wet coat and the metallic sounds of a key was accompanied by supressd curses. Warmth spread in his core at the knowledge that the human was about to enter. It was another sensation Connor basked in, pulling his awareness away from the weather to his personal situation. How awesome that the mere knowledge of the human's impending arrival was able to make him feel this way. 

Connor got up from the chair that faced the window and turned to the door when it opened. The man's face was not visible in the dark room with the only light from the hallway in the back, but Connor knew him so well, he could have painted him from memory. Every line, every hair was engraved in his memory storage. They worked together for five months now. Since Connor became assigned to captain Allen's SWAT team as the android councelor. And since then he had had a lot of possibilities to memorize this specific face. 

He inclined his head, waiting to be recognized. The human was still busy to get out of the soaked coat while trying to close the door without dripping water all over the floor. Connors polite program urged him to step up and help but he knew that this would startle the human. And Captain Allen did not react well to being startled, as many policemen did. It was a part of the job. 

"God dammit!" The coat landed against the hook and the door slammed shut, pouring inky darkness into the room again. The wet clothing didn't catch and slid down the wall to land in a moist heap. 

Connor couldn't prevent a light chuckle at that. That a sniper was so clumsy at throwing things amused the android. 

Allen spun around, wide eyes searching the darkness. His hand was already on the weapon by his side, but he hesitated. 

"Connor?" 

"Yes."

The human visibly relaxed when the android nodded, his pale skin reflecting the dim light from the outside. 

Connor hesitated. Even with all the thorough programing he had received, so many things humans did were unclear to him. Had he overstayed his welcome? 

"I got distracted by the weather."

A moment of silence spread between them. Then Allen stepped up to the wall and switched the light on. Connor didn't do more than blink once, his visual sensors had already anticipated the increase in light and adjusted, while the human blinked with narrow eyes. He looked around. 

"Distracted, huh?" 

To his relief Allen relaxed and then smiled. Connor's own lips curved up more. His thirium pump moved faster which also spread new sensations in his entire body. Captain Allen was a well of new sensations for him. To be in his close proximity alone did things to his main processor, raising a wealth of experiences he - in lack of a better word - called _emotions_. Especially after what had happened only hours ago. 

The human came closer, his eyes resting on Connor's face. Without a moment of hesitation he crossed the line that the android knew was the personal space for a human. It elicited another increase of the pump's speed and other sensations, akin to what humans called nervosity. Connor licked his lips. Stimulation of the very sensitive sensoric instruments in his mouth often calmed him and helped him to focus. But now it drew Allen's gaze there. 

Allen approached until his face was only inches apart from Connor's. He could taste the human's breath and that reminded him of the night before. 

"Tell me about it." 

Connor's eyes searched in Allen's for a clue what he meant. A thunder crashed loudly and the sudden sound made him twitch. 

"It's… exciting. To listen to the storm."

"I see…" Allen closed the distance and Connor experienced what humans called butterflies in one's tummy. Their lips touched and overflowing sensations filled Connor's analyzer. His body became tense all over for a second when his processor tried to sort out all the data. A lot of it got translated into heat he felt pouring into his whole body. 

It truly was amazing what a single human was capable of…


	2. Connecting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Six months before...

**April, 25th, 2039**

The blueish light of the TV painted sharp contrasts in the else unlit room. Lieutenant Anderson had recently switched from the news to a movie he had liked as a kid and deemed necessary to watch as a "fresh deviant". 

Connor sat with Hank, watching obediently how a small robot tried to clean up a deserted earth, but most of his capacity was occupied with processing data about his new superior Captain Allen. Connor only needed a tiny bit of his random-access memory to follow the plot anyway so there was plenty of space to sort out the events of the day and what it worked up in him. Today the first real mission had taken place, even if he was part of the SWAT unit for less than a month now. In the beginning Connor had only being present in the briefings, giving advice on android related questions and so on, but now he had been allowed to accompany the team in a possible combat situation. But what occupied his data processing way more than the deviant android they dealt with today was… Captain Allen. He just… made it easier for Connor. He was clear and precise in his orders, easy to understand and to follow. In their professional relationship everything was sorted and nothing left between the lines. Or as much as Connor knew, he couldn't be absolutely sure that he caught onto everything since humans were strangely vague in so many aspects. But the captain was way more transparent to him than others. 

The other members of the team had regarded Connor carefully, maybe even distrustful, but Allen made clear that Connor was part of the "family" now and everybody who had a problem with that could sign a complaint and rot. 

Since the end of the mission however, Connor felt strangely unsettled. He tried to figure it out. 

On the screen the little robot had found a friend. Their white body with the blue LED reminded Connor of the armlet he himself and every other Android had been forced to wear until the liberation. Now that he was free, he could wear what he wanted, but decided to stay with tie and white shirt under a grey jacket. If Captain Allen found him unadventurous? That thought was irrational but still somewhat unpleasant. 

Maybe he should talk to Hank about it. The human was his friend, wasn't he? More than a friend, to be honest. Hank even had offered that Connor could stay with him and Sumo as long as had no place to live on his own. This was more than generous and the android had gladly agreed. It was a relief to not have to sort his life alone from one moment to the other. 

So Hank was closer to him than anybody else ever had been. But still Connor hesitated. 

These new feelings were… precious. Like finding something that was strange, unsettling, but beautiful. He didn't want to risk to be told that it was just a regular thing, not a big deal. Or that he should not waste his time with thinking about it. Maybe Hank would call him silly or make fun of it or… 

He stopped that unproductive loop. His problem solving module offered other solutions and calculated the chance for success. 

He could ask an fellow android about these feelings. He knew some who were much more familiar with humans than he was. Markus or North for example. But they were busy with leading the way into every androids future. And besides… it wasn't something he wanted to share with them either. Somehow he suspected another android to look down on this fascination with a human he experienced. Calling it a software fault. He should get over it-... 

"You're doing it again."

Connor startled and turned to Hank, raising his eyebrows. "Huh?" 

"You're licking your lips. The sixth or seventh time in the last twenty minutes." The human's warm eyes rested on him and Connor could see the minute twitch of Hanks left eyebrow. He was made fun of in a good-hearted way. "It's a sign that you're nervous."

Connor blinked and opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He felt the wetness of his own fluids on his lips. Hank was right. 

"Am I?" he asked, unsure how to proceed. 

"I'd say so. Question is why."

Connor turned to the TV again, his eyebrows furrowing the tiniest bit. Confusion made itself known. 

"I thought I couldn't be nervous because I'm -..." 

"... a machine, I know you told me one or two times." Hank rolled his eyes. "But deviants experience emotions, right? And you look quite nervous to me. Worked up. Your uptight arse is even more tense than usual."

Connor took no offense in Hanks bawdy expression, he knew what laid behind was worry for his well being. But his mind was occupied with what the human had said about feelings before. And the fact that most of the movie had passed without him noticing it. 

"Maybe… it's the new situation. Being with the SWAT team. It's tense sometimes." He looked over to Hank as if he expected his friend to confirm that this was the right interpretation. But Hank only shrugged. 

Connor thought about it. Maybe Hank was right. The feedback his main processor sent into his biocomponents was indeed similar to what humans called nervosity. Of course the nervosity of working with a close group of humans from now on, as a freshly freed android in a society that struggled to let go of stereotypes and aversions. This wasn't about the captain alone at all! 

But Captain Allen had this thing about him. This specific vibe Connor could not put a finger on. But whatever it was, it made him  _ feel _ things. Connor had no idea when it began but the green eyes, always so sharp and focused, the clipped tone in his deep voice. Especially when the mission had started, the man's movements were precise-... not like a machine, more like a predator of sorts. Fluid. Concise… Connor couldn't find the right comparison in his database, but all of the man raised a strange warmth in the android. With Allen around, Connor felt somewhat safe in his new duties and since the captain still remembered how Connor had solved the first shard case he was willing to cut him some slack and let him handle things in his own way. 

Hank waited a couple of seconds more before he made a gesture with his hand that communicated very clearly that he was done waiting for Connor to carry on talking. He got up.

"I'll grab myself a beer. You can continue to try to figure out feelings."

Connor stayed behind, his brow furrowed. His eyes returned to the TV where the two robots had solved the problem - whatever it had been - and celebrated the success. It reminded him of the cheers after the mission. The tension had ebbed away with nobody injured. He remembered Captain Allen's hand on his shoulder, a rare smile on the man's face. 

_ "Good job, Connor! Damn good job!" _ He had patted Connor's shoulder, even squeezed it shortly before he turned to his team to give them some appreciation too. Connor had been left behind with a confusing mix of data running through his body. It seemed that the touch of the human's skin doubled the strange warmth in Connor's main processor, especially if accompanied with a heartfelt praise. 

"I don't think-... that's possible, Lieutenant."

Hank, back on the couch, beer in hand sent him an inquisitive gaze. "Huh?" 

Connor regarded him with his usual neutral gaze, even if inside of him was chaos. 

"To make sense. It seems it's not in my programming any longer."


	3. Team

**May, 6th,2039**

Connor arrived at the training area, looking around. His steps resounded on the smooth floor when he entered through the glass doors. 

The empty hallways smelled slightly of polished linoleum and oiled wood with an undertone of cotton and exercise. 

It was his first time in this part of the police department and Connor still felt a bit out of place, but Captain Allen had insisted. Connor replayed the internal recording of the conversation with the Captain that led to the upcoming events. 

_ "I don't need physical training. I'm a machine." _

_ "Maybe. But it's part of being a team. If you want the others to hold your back when it gets tight you need to know them." _

_ "And knowing entails doing exercise?"  _

_ "Knowing entails that you learn how someone's body reacts when they move fast. In a hairy situation you can't stop and think what to do next or how the other members of the team will move forward. That's why we have physical and combat training on a regular basis. To engrave the other's movements into our brains." _

Connor raised his eyebrows and nodded in understanding. He reacted way faster than a human and could rely on his calculations even if it got "hairy". But his combat routines were uploaded, he had never  _ trained _ them. And humans were incalculable, they did things the most advanced processor could not predict. So he had to learn their ways. To be part of the team, a gear in a greater machine. 

With that issue settled and Connor equipped with track pants and sneakers he was ready to join training, whatever that meant. 

The soles made quiet squeaking noises on the sports hall floor. The team was present already, doing stretches next to a couple of flat blue mats when he neared. Everybody wore the same navy colored track pants and white t-shirts with the DPD-emblem. Connor nodded to Captain Allen, who stood in front of the group, his hands on his hips. He looked as sharp in sportswear as in his SWAT uniform, maybe due to his focused expression and posture. 

"Good, now that everybody is present, how about some nice rounds of running, hm?" 

The group moaned but one after another started to move, the clapping of sneakers on the halls floor slowly turning from a unamazed trudge to rhythmic running. Connor followed behind, mimicking what the others were doing. 

The captain passed him. Connor noted that in motion Allen's shirt accentuated the lines of his neck and back in an interesting way. His muscles worked and there was a certain grace in it. As if everything the captain did was done with full control and effort, no half hearted attempts. A stream of irritating data spread all over Connor's body and started to raise its temperature so he focused on his own steps. 

"Alright guys," Allen called and the team gathered, slightly out of breath from ten rounds around the hall.

"Good to see you gain some color. Listen up, from now on Connor trains with us." 

Everybody looked at Connor who tried a smile that nobody returned. 

Allen didn't so much as raise an eyebrow and continued. "Even if he looks like an accountant, he has combat routines, so don't take him for a weakling. Get in position."

The team stepped onto the mats, pairing up. Of course nobody was left alone and Connor stood there, the trace of a smile still on his face, waiting.

Allen sighed. "Good, with me then." He gestured for the others to begin and stepped up to the android. "Something I need to know?" 

Connor inclined his head in question. 

Allen gestured impatiently. "No-go areas. Parts that start to pour blue stuff when I punch too hard."

"My purpose was to work with the police so my model is equipped with enforced fibers in all main body parts. You should not be able to damage me in a training fight." Connor gave back, surprised by his own indignation. He paused a second. "It might hurt though, since I'm processing impact data differently since I became deviant." 

Allen frowned, but then nodded. 

"Well then, shall we? Just try to dodge the attacks."

*

Connor was not able to get exhausted in a physical way, but after the training with Allen he felt…  _ used _ . He could not describe it in any other way. The exercise had been demanding for his whole system, mechanical and digital parts alike. He felt areas where he had gotten harder hits or kicks, the fibres still sending out light warnings that a human would call  _ bruised _ . 

The team members were fit and used to fight, even against androids it seemed. And Captain Allen… he had trained with a determination that bordered on doggedness. Connor didn't manage to get him down on the mat for longer than a few seconds. Even if the man was soaked in sweat now he stood upright, his body as flexible as in the beginning. 

Connor licked his lips. He could taste the man's scent in the air, enhanced by the straining physical activity. A drop of sweat ran down Allen's temple and Connor followed it with his eyes. The sensations were quite distracting and Connor tried to leave it be. 

At least the other team members seemed to have lost a bit of their reservation against him. They walked closer to him mow, unguarded, included him in their talks, even if Connor participated only with smiles and nods. Allen had been right. It  _ was _ a team-building measure! Connor was so much engaged in the feeling of belonging that he didn't spare a thought about it, but followed into the shower. He didn't sweat, but he felt a bit dirtied from hands on him and hitting the ground several times. 

When he stepped out of his clothes however, the mood changed. He did recognize it fully when the room became silent. Eyes followed the lines of his body and came to an halt between his legs. He could feel the other's gaze while they ogled his genital-less crotch. Connor was not programmed to feel shame, but still the situation became uncomfortable. 

"Stop staring. He's an android. Haven't gotten the message yet?" Allen's cutting tone raised nervous chuckles and harrumphs, but the others turned to the water sprays and the chit-chat returned. 

Connor turned the back to the others before he stepped under the water himself. He felt awkward and the fact that Allen, naked as the rest of them, stopped close to him under the last free spray didn't make it any easier. He poured a bit of soap in his hands and lathered his arms, trying to get it over with. 

"Are all androids build like that?" 

Connor shook his head. His voice was indifferent but his sensors observed Captain Allen carefully. 

"It depends on the purpose you've been made for." 

The human stopped in his tracks and regarded him with wide eyes. Then he shook his head and Connor saw something akin to disgust cross his face. The expression made Connor's insides turn tight and hot at the same time. He wished the floor would open to swallow him whole and that was highly irrational. 

No more word was shared, instead an uncomfortable silence replaced the formerly easy mood between them. 

After dressing Connor used the first opportunity to excuse himself. Everybody else went to lunch, so it was a welcome excuse that he didn't eat to leave without raising suspicion. Even if he felt Allen's eyes in his back, he didn't turn. 

Why the fact that his crotch was just a smooth surface was such an issue he couldn't point out, neither why he himself felt suddenly so ashamed about it. 


	4. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hank tries to explain the realy complicated things.

**May, 8th,2039**

Conor sat on a bench in Grand Circus Park close to the statue of Hazens Pingree and listened to the various birds. It was a cloudy day and not very warm yet but the trees burgeoned and the small flying animals searched material for their nests. A tiny brown bird hopped around between Connor's feet, not in the slightest shy or afraid of the unmoving android. _'Sparrow'_ Connor's memory provided but he didn't pay it too much attention. His mind processed other data he had gathered in the short span what he called his existence. 

The Eden Club tried his best with soft light and fluffy bedding, but could not blind someone to the fact that it was a harsh place. The androids did their best to be inviting, lolling behind glass or dancing on a pole, smiling, but barely clothed, to be ogled unashamed. Despite the pink and the glitter the place held an cold, impersonal, almost sterile atmosphere. Slight traces of disinfectant adhered on everything. 

And still - people came here to find pleasure, affection, sex. Maybe love. Whatever that was. 

Connor processed the memory of the place and the experiences he made there while touching the Tracis. He never did much with the data he had procured back then but now he searched the files for information. Information on how this worked for humans. What they sought, liked, despised. And why. 

The Tracis were made for the purpose of providing pleasure to humans and he had memorized two hours each of seven different models. Fourteen hours of insights of a place where humans and androids interacted in most intimate ways. 

Was this disgusting? Connor processed data. He saw a broad variety of encounters between the androids and their customers and couldn't make sense of it. Some scenes were forceful, others tender and sensitive. Some of the human's didn't even initiate bodily contact. Some of them just watched the Traci dance, move, using toys on various body parts. Others only wanted to be held, caressed in the most innocent ways, even sat and talked with the Traci they had booked, shared secrets of pain and humiliation. And the Tracis provided.

The bird gave up to wait for some breadcrumbs and flew away. Connor's eyes followed the small being until his optical unit couldn't identify it anymore. Then he got up and started his way to Hank's house. 

*

"What are humans gaining from sexual activity?" 

Hank sputtered the sip of beer all over the table at Connor's question before he started to cough. Connor patted his back. "I'm sorry Lieutenant, it wasn't my intention-…" 

Hank turned to him, his eyes watery and his cheeks red.

"What the _fuck_ , Connor?!" He wiped beer from his beard. "Do that one more time and you can order in the undertaker!" 

Connor ducked his head and tried a apologetic smile. 

Hank looked around if somebody had seen him but when that wasn't the case calmed down. They sat in a corner of Jimmy's Bar, a place where androids were allowed since a couple of weeks. Despite the dirty sink and the broken seat in the bathroom Hank liked the place and since Connor didn't drink or use the bathroom he accompanied him from time to time. Now he sat next to his friend across a TV where a basketball game was about to start. 

Hank however, was not thinking about the upcoming game anymore. He rubbed his face. 

"I thought your _database contains information on all aspects of human behavior_ " he quoted Connor's earlier sayings with a sarcastic undertone. "No data about that?" 

"There is." Connor gave back indignantly. "But I don't get behind the meaning of some aspects. Like… it's about reproduction. But humans act so… restrained about it. In public. And act out strange things in private. That are not at all related to reproduction itself."

Hank rolled his eyes as if to say _'Why me'_ , but he didn't interrupt and listened. Finally he took another sip of his beer, now that he wasn't in danger of choking on it any longer. 

"If I had an answer to those questions I'd not be working for the DPD, that much is sure." He groaned. "I think the whole things is about… connection. Or maybe not. But often it is. Two people doing things because... they want to be _close_. Closer than with anybody else. And sex is a cringy thing. You're vulnerable, open. To share this… it's part of becoming a couple." Hank shrugged. 

Connor wasn't satisfied. He gnawed on the non-fitting parts like Sumo on a bone. 

"But why do people pay for it? To do it with somebody they don't want to connect with?" 

"I don't know! Instinct? Humans are animals, they want to fuck. Or some of them do. Whatever, I told you, it's cringy!" It was obvious that the topic made Hank uncomfortable, and Connor was about to apologize for bringing it up. But then the lieutenant continued, rubbing his beard in thinking. He often felt responsible to teach the naive android about the world and such. 

"Maybe it's easier to pay somebody to do what you want because you never see them again. They get paid and it's a job, no need to feel embarrassed." Hank watched him intently now. "Or maybe they use an android. Even less reason to cringe."

Connor pressed his lips together. The fact that androids were made to be used seemed to make them lesser in the eyes of many humans. It made no sense. Somehow this made him… mad. 

"What do androids do to feel connected?" 

Connor looked up, being pulled out of his gloomy thoughts. He blinked. 

"I'm not sure." he began slowly. "I never was that close. Maybe they do it while interfacing." He never had felt the need to explore that connection. 

"I wonder how the Tracis felt about that…" Hank mused. "The blue haired one said something about laying in her lovers arms. I wonder if they connected like humans."

Connor thought about it. "Maybe-... Maybe it's something androids learn from humans. Like… when we hugged after the revolution." He felt a strange kind of hope inside himself. Hank smiled at him and this time it was a very warm expression. He ruffled Connor's hair. 

"That we did."


	5. Briefings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Human-Android interaction is complicated...

**May, 10th, 2039**

"So that's it ladies and gents, in and out, quick and quiet. Any questions?" Captain Allen looked around, but nobody raised a hand. The briefing had covered all the necessary details and the team was ready to go. Drones successfully nosed out the Red-Ice facility, marking locations, number of people and firearms. Allen had presented a simulation of the surroundings and which way they would take to get in unseen with which everybody was on board. He clapped his hands once "Alright. Get some proper sleep tonight, operation starts tomorrow at 5 am."

Quiet murmuring rose, scratching of the chairs feet on the ground when the SWAT team got up and started to leave the small briefing room. Connor, who had been seated in the last row, waited while the others poured out the door. Before he could follow however, a voice held him back. "Connor." 

The android turned with a curious expression. 

Allen crossed the room and came closer. Even if they were the last two remaining in the room he didn't want to shout it seemed. 

Out of his SWAT uniform he didn't look so different to himself the android noted. In the office Allen preferred a more formal look than most of the officers. A crisp white shirt, the collar opened under a light grey jacket and fitting black jeans were a matching mix between serious and casual. In passing Connor took note of the unobtrusive aftershave, memorizing the brand. 

The human's eyes searched in Connor's face as if he expected something from the android, but Connor regarded him with his usual calm. "Yes, Captain?" 

"I wanted to talk to you about what happened after the training the other day. Uhm-..." Allen began in an unusual roundabout way, his gaze moving to the side. 

Connor, remembering the sudden feelings of shame and embarrassment about being seen naked by the team, pressed his lips closed for a split second. "I'm not entirely sure what you refer to, Captain." he began. "If this is about the shower however, I assure you that I'm not uncomfortable." 

Relief flashed over Allen's face, but Connor continued before he could get a word in. "It's a very common reaction to feel repulsed by aspects of android anatomy. It is foreign and different to what you're used to and I apologize if-..." 

"Wohwohwoh, stop a second!" Allen raised both hands, his eyes wide. 

Connor did as he was told and clapped his mouth shut. The human leaned in, his eyes small. Since he was about half a hand shorter than the android he had to look up from this close, but it didn't make him any less intimidating. "You thought I was pushed off by  _ that _ ? Well, that's why I wanted to talk to you."

Allen crossed his arms, searching for words. "It's not-... It's more that-... I felt pushed off by humans. By humans who build androids with or without genitalia to serve a purpose with them. I mean, that's-... that's awful."

Connor raised one eyebrow. "Is it, Captain Allen? Is this different to build an android with arms, to lift? With a knowledge of recipes to cook? With legs to walk in order to fetch a thing?" Allen opened his mouth but Conor wasn't finished. "Please don't mind me. But I think it's idle to ponder about this.  _ Purpose _ is what birthed my race and purpose is what defines us. But the free will decides what we do with the bodies we've been given."

Allen, stunned, just regarded him with wide eyes. 

Connor bowed his head. 

"If you'll excuse me…" 

He turned and left the briefing room before Allen could come up with a response. 

Right out of the door Connor almost stumbled over Hank who waited for him in the hallway. Conner felt his face flush. Had Hank heard their small exchange? Behind him Allen nodded to the lieutenant in greeting and fled, obviously flustered and disturbed by the conversation. Connor tried to play it cool and followed Hank to their adjoining desks. Even if he was assigned to the SWAT unit now, Connor's main workplace had stayed the same, which usually was a good thing. 

When they sat down now however, Connor tried to ignore his friend as best as possible. Hank had this specific expression that Connor in secret called the Hank-face. It showed that the human had a very loud opinion about something, but was too amused or fond of what was happening to voice it loud. Yet. 

Connor sighed soundlessly, counting to ten. 

_ '... three… four… five-...' _

"Is this you flirting or what?" 

Whatever it had been that Connor had suspected, this wasn't it. He looked up, baffled. 

"Pardon, Lieutenant?" 

Hank leaned back, the Hank-face more than prominent now. His mouth corner twitched and his eyes twinkled with suppressed amusement. 

"If you try to win the Cap over with philosophy I need to tell you that it's a lost case."

Irritation made itself known in Connor and he felt a mixture of being offended and as if he had been caught doing something unsavory. He looked over his shoulder but nobody seemed to have heard them. He leaned in onto Hank's side of the desk and whispered. "What do you mean with  _ win him over _ ? That's-… that's not-..."

"Uhu. " Hank nodded and leaned back. Both eyebrows were up now and the smile grew wider. 

Connor's eyes went small but eh decided to leave it be. The lieutenant was way to entertained by all this so he focused on his work. 

_ 'Flirting? He wasn't flirting!'  _

He had to prepare a raid!


	6. Mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Canon typical violence and topics in this chapter

**May, 12th,2039**

It was about 7am when the operation started. A cloudy sky and the gloomy morning light provided cover for team in their the dark uniforms.

The factory hall that housed the drug manufacturer was located in the outskirts of Detroit's Corktown quarter, a place where a lot of buildings already were torn down to make way for the new hi-speed rail. 

The approach had started on the roof of a neighboring building and now the team descended to the lower grounds to raid the drug manufacturing. The abandoned place was littered with scattered bricks and other debris, milky afternoon light trickled through the dirty and splintered windows. Despite the uneven ground the SWAT unit moved forward surprisingly quiet, the combat boots only making small scratching sounds on the littered floor. In practiced ease they scurried from one pillar to the next, moving towards the metal door at the end of the hall. Behind it, the drones had confirmed was where production, packing and distribution of the drug happened. This was one of the biggest facilities for Red-Ice and to get a hold on the people in charge would count as a big win against organized criminality. 

Soundless commands let the team spread, weapons drawn, covering the area while advancing towards the door. Connor followed the team, for the first time geared up in SWAT uniform himself, except the helmet since such an item covered too much if his sensors to navigate and analyze properly. The heavy gear made him feel clumsy, but the captain had insisted. It was part of being a member of the team. Connor was not furnished with a weapon however, was his main purpose to deal with the androids who worked in the facility. He decided to not ponder on the reasons, despite that he was as proficient as any other team member in handling a gun. Hopefully it was not a sign of mistrust due to the fact that he was an android. 

As far as the information for the briefing had gone the androids in the facility weren't freed yet. Connor expected it to be gruesome. Red-Ice was manufactured with Thirium and hydrochloride acid. The process was dangerous and toxic why in general androids did the job. Hopefully there was not much resistance to be expected, especially from the artifical members. 

The team arrived on a metal door. According to the briefing the area where the drug got packed was behind. The most of the dealers were expected to be here too so Connor was advised to stay behind. 

Clark and Pivo took position left and right, Baxter in front. A moment of tension spread, eye contact confirmed that everybody was ready. 

At Captain Allen's silent command the heavy combat boot crashed down on the door, smashing it out of its frame. The room behind, filled with crates and canisters, old furniture provided cover and using the element of surprise, the team swarmed in, attempting to disarming the group of dealers. Chaos erupted, shouts, gunshots, bursting wood on concrete floor, cries of the wounded. The team marched forward firing rapidly. 

Connor stepped in behind them, taking in the scene. Captain Allen gestured urgently for him to move behind a cover. Shouting, crashing of furniture, more shots. Connor stayed close to the wall. His super fast processing analyzed the situation, but without a gun he couldn't do much but watch the fight continue. 

Only two criminals were left in the room still armed with rifle guns and pistols. Finally Baxter shot one of the dealers who collapsed with a cry. The last one looked at his colleague and then surrendered. His weapon slid over the dirty floor when he kicked it away from himself and lifted his arms. 

The team advanced, still cautious of the last remaining criminal but soon they had him tied up against a wall. 

Allen gestured to the team to check on the storage room before he beckoned Conor to follow him and Pivo to the other door at the end of the room. 

"Let's clear this shit hole."

"Please Captain, stay behind." Connor asked, raising his hand. "If the drug is manufactured there, the environment will be toxic for humans. Maybe there's a trap for intruders." 

Allen regarded him with a sceptical look, but then nodded. He and Pivo stepped behind the android, getting their gas masks ready, weapons drawn. 

Connor opened the door slowly. 

The room behind laid in the dark. A blue-ish glow emitted by android-armlets accented what was in there. A quiet whirring sounded from the depths of the blackness. Even for Connor's advanced sight it took a couple of seconds to get used to the dark, to see what was in there. Out of the gloominess more low whirring sounds dripped. The team moved closer, slowly, the breath of the two humans behind the gas asks prominent in the quiet. It was cold. 

The flame of a blowtorch flashed, pouring ghostly light over three androids, who worked on canisters and burners. They didn't seem to notice that somebody had entered.

"Oh my _fucking_ God…" Captain Allen's voice sounded scratchy through his breath filter. 

Due to the exposure with toxic gas half of the androids faces were melted. Like a candle that stood too close to an oven, parts had slipped down, drooped, deformed. The drug manufacturers hadn't paid much attention to the androids, so parts that got destroid were replaced in an careless way, just riveted onto the damaged parts or taped roughly. Where the melted flesh had vanished, Android bones, covered in thirium stains were visible. The cords moved slowly, which cause the whirring. The unemotional expression of the androids and the jerky movements made the room into a chamber of horrors. 

"I don't think that counceling is needed here, sir." Connor stated in a calm voice. None of the robots appeared as if they were conscious any longer. 

Allen made a noise that sounded a bit as if he wanted to throw up. He turned on his heel and marched back into the front room where his team had started to sort through the evidence. Most of them had proceeded to a storage at the other and of the hall so nobody was around when Allen ripped of his mask and helmet to draw some breath. "Fuck-..." he cursed, trying to gather himself. 

Everything happened in slow motion for Connor. Allen, distracted, holding his helmet, his gun at his belt. The drug dealer they had thought dead, laying on his back in a puddle of blood, lifting his gun. The bullet on its way. Allen's shoulder, colliding hard against his. A ripping pain in his own shoulder, a splash of blue over Allen's face. The impact of the ground. More shooting, Allen shouting his name. The team closing in. 

Connor looked down on Captain Allen, a bit of his thirium dripping down on the human's cheek. Green eyes, full of shock. Still beautiful. 

Darkness. 


	7. Allen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mostly Allen's pov. Finally.

**May, 12th, 2039**

Gabriel Allen knew the routines. Officer injured on duty. Ambulance, emergency room, talking to the surgeon, calling the family. Too often had his own duty entailed to provide comfort because the officer hadn't made it. Part of the job. 

What wasn't part of the job - at least as far as he was concerned - was to get said officer to repair service. No ambulance, just a van where the android was carelessly placed in the back. No urgent carrying off the injured into surgery, no nurses holding a saline drip, instead two mechanics who placed him on a cart and wheeled him into the shop. One of them was smoking. 

Gabriel, left behind in the reception area, felt out of step, as if he had a script to a scene nobody else followed. He rocked on his feet a little, full of piled-up energy, unsure what to do with it. The room was stocked with tools and spare parts, an android sorting through the items slowly. He wore a armlet. Gabriel's eyes fell on a pin-up calendar on the wall, oil stains on the floor. Nobody seemed in a hurry. 

He sat down on a cheap plastic chair, carding his fingers through his hair. Some strands were still sticky with blue blood and dust. He needed a shower. Slowly his pumped up mind and body came to rest. 

It was… weird. Connor was so fleshly in his quirks and behaviors that Gabriel almost forgot that he was not human. Until something reminded him. A misplaced expression. A completely smooth crotch. Blue blood in his hair. 

His hand touched his cheek where he still felt the cold splatter of the thirium when Connor had pushed him out of the way of the bullet. Connor falling on top of him, shielding him against the other shots. The slender body twitching with the impacts. Brown eyes gazing at him with an almost serene expression. Blue dripping from pale smiling lips. 

Gabriel shook his head. 

He wasn't human. A machine. But wasn't that something the society tried to overcome?  _ 'Androids are alive.' _ was one of the slogans one could see everywhere these days. And Gabriel knew that it was true. It didn't matter if a person was artificial or not. As long as they were a good person. He shook his head again. Connor had infected him with philosophy it seemed. 

_ 'Purpose is what birthed us, free will is what we make of it.' _

Gabriel remembered Connor's words vividly. The android had seemed almost proud while saying them, his eyes rating on Gabriel's without hesitancy or shame. 

_ 'Out of your free will you saved my sorry ass.' _

"There's a lot of damage. Maybe you should think about scrapping it."

Gabriel jerked up at the voice, needing a moment to find back into the here and now. "What?!" he asked. 

The mechanic who stepped out of the shop, cleaned his hands on a rug and raised his eyebrows.

"The android you brought in. Maybe easier to get rid of it. It's roughed up a lot." The man saw Gabriel's expression darken and backpaddled immediately. "Uhm-... Of course, we can try to safe it. Will take some time. Spare parts. Stuff like that. Uh."

"He is an  _ police officer _ who got injured while doing his duty." Gabriel snapped. "So you'd better get him back on the streets!"

The man gaped at him before he turned to waddle back into the workshop. It seemed to be safer to just comply with the blue splattered maniac in combat uniform than discussing with him.

Gabriel sat down again, face in his hands, waiting. 

*

Connor's system came back online with a electric buzz that he felt all over his body. He opened his eyes and stared at the blotchy ceiling while memory data floated through his mind. The old factory, the Red-Ice facility, a criminal attacking Captain Allen. Connor blinked, the LED on his temple running wild. He had been damaged. 

Connor ran diagnoses while he slowly sat up. Parts of him had been repaired, he could sense the alterations. At least the work had been done by a skilled person. He looked around. He sat naked on a metalic table, lots of tools and equipment surrounding him on every even surface. Sensors were placed on his chest and belly, connected with various devices, running diagnoses on their own. His fingers felt one of the wires. 

A man stepped up to him. Connor waited patiently while he loosened the sensors. "System report?"

"All systems online. No malfunctions detected." he answered without thinking. 

"Good. Your clothes are over there. Doors on the other side."

The android nodded and slipped off the table. He stopped short when he reached the pile of clothes. It wasn't the combat uniform he had worn before but his usual attire of white shirt, tie and jacket. Even the shoes were there. Had Hank brought them over for him? Connor smiled to himself. Hopefully his friend hadn't worried too much. 

He dressed while the mechanic was already occupied with other things, ignoring the android in his shop completely. Since apparently he was finished with him Connor decided to leave. His inner clock told him that the raid had happened more than 12 hours ago. Time to get home. 

He stepped out of the shop into a waiting and retail area. There he stopped short. 

It wasn't Hank who sat in one of the uncomfortable looking chairs, head leaning on the wall, snoring softly. 

It was Captain Allen.

*

Allen looked Connor up and down. The human seemed disturbed by the fact that roughly after ten hours Connor was from being severely wounded back on his feet and fresh as the next day. To gloss over his irritation he offered him a ride, explaining that he promised Hank to get Connor home safely. Now the android sat next to him in Allen's car, hands in his lap and a warm feeling in his freshly repaired guts. 

The captain had waited for him to wake up. Even slept in the workshop to wait if he would be alright. Connor could not fight the small smile on his lips at that, hoping the captain wouldn't mind. 

"There we are…" Allen announced and parked the car on the curb in front of Hank's house. 

"Thank you Captain."

Allen turned to him, appearing a bit flustered. "No. I mean, thank  _ you _ . You-... saved my life."

Connor regarded him calmly but the smile stayed on his face.

"It was my pleasure."

Anything else he might have been saying was cut off by Hank however, who rushed out of the house to greet them, grousing all the way inside about careless androids and how he would lose all his hair over them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like the story, I'd love to hear from you :) <3


	8. Nerves

**June, 15th, 2039**

Some time had passed since the raid of the Red-Ice facility. At first Hank had kept such an eye on him that Connor almost felt under surveillance.

"I figured that when you die this time… you're not coming back." he said sheepishly when Connor confronted him softly. It warmed him that Hank truly had been worried about him and now behaved like a mother hen. Nobody ever had cared that much for him before and it was a good feeling, even if it could be a bit exhausting. After a couple of weeks however the situation normalized again. 

Unfortunately this applied to the relationship with Captain Allen too. His superior wasn't unfriendly, but somehow strictly professional around Connor. It was an behavior many humans showed with androids these days, stemming from insecurity about what was appropriate regarding a life form one had considered mere tools just month ago. But between Connor and the captain things had happened, hadn't they? He couldn't be sure anymore. No matter how often he replayed the recordings in his memory, he was not able to interpret them in an unambiguous way. 

Connor played with a pen, thinking about the situation. He a t at his usual desk across Hank's, a file about a robbery open on his computer. The beginning of summer came with low crime rates and not much work for the SWAT team, so each member was assigned with normal police work between training and Strategie briefings. 

"Have you seen the pictures? I tell you, I'm on this job for twenty years now, but if I had seen the same done to a human I would have thrown up right then and there."

"It's the third or fourth case, isn't it?" 

"The sixth. The first wasn't recognized, looked like a traffic accident. But now it's clear that this is a pattern. Hopefully a single perpetrator."

"Whoever it is, they surely must hate the plastics a lot."

"Not so loud. Connor can hear you."

Of course be could. His hearing was way more defined and adjustable than that of a human. The two officers walked over to the break room, and even there he could have eavesdropped if he wanted to. But he decided to tune the conversation out. He already knew of the 'plastic killer', a person who didn't liked the changes that slowly rolled through society, changing the game. Androids or 'plastics' how the new right wing movement called them, weren't well liked by everybody, not at all. There had been enough resistance against them when they had been mindless slaves. Now that they demanded payment, rights and their own places it wasn't better. Just because Connor was lucky and often surrounded by friendly humans who genuinely liked him, he was not blind for the hatred that still festered in the society.

North had talked about it a lot. She even started a project to relocate the planned Android housing to Westwood Park, a decaying quarter where only a few humans were left. The houses there were almost ruins but many androids were skilled in repairs, and even building new ones. And there was plenty enough room. An android didn't need much space, no food and even heating was only to keep mold and decay away. Under North's lead new homes emerged, some of them in way better shape than the humans could afford. But even if many androids retreated into their own quarter and tried to stay among themselves, it wasn't easy. And the newest series of murders confirmed it. 

"Found any traces?" Hank asked. So he had overheard the conversation too. 

"Fowler hasn't assigned me to the case. He suspects me to be too invested."

Hank just rolled his eyes. 

Connor tried to focus on the case he had to deal with and sighed. 

Again. 

As soon as he recognized it, he sat up a little straighter and looked around. 

Had somebody heard? 

The life in the DPD went on as usual. Hank shook his head but said nothing, focusing on his work. Nobody else seemed to have recognized it. 

Connor relaxed slightly, scrolling around on his computer. In seconds the feeling was back, a strange need down in his chest to draw a deep breath and...  _ sigh _ . 

His eyes fell on his desk where a small notebook laid between his hands. With astonishment Connor noted that he had made little scetches on his notes while his thoughts had wandered around. A perfect copy of Allen's profile, the serious forehead, the sharp nose, those lips. 

Connor sighed again. 

*

At the ride home Connor noted that Hank was darting glances at him. Apparently he had recognized the moody behaviour of his android friend, but he kept his thoughts to himself this time. 

Sumo welcomed both of them with happy whelps and a lot of slobber. After dinner (Hank) and a sip of thirium (Connor) both ended up in front of the TV. 

Connor fidgeted around nervously. He processed memory data and correlated it with his knowledge about relationships which wasn't much. But the result was always the same. Captain Allen occupied his mind. Finally he turned to Hank. 

"Why did you think that I was flirting with Captain Allen?" he asked, referring to what Hank had been saying weeks ago. Why was his own voice so quiet and shy? 

Hank turned to him, this time with a more serious expression, all jokes gone. 

"You watch him, whenever he is present. Ogling him even I'd say. You talk about him. A lot. And you do this thing before he comes your way. This…" he gestured to his own collar. "The tie thing. Even check if the lock of yours is in place and all that."

Connor listened to all that Hank had observed and to his shock the human was right. He did all that! He licked his lips. 

"Yeah, that too." Hank nodded. The he patted Connor's shoulder in a reassuring way. "Ah, com'on. It's not the end of the world. You're developing feelings. Some of them seem to be of the romantic kind."

"Romantic…"

"Yep. Not the worst."

"It's… embarrassing." 

"How comes?" 

"He is a human. I'm an android. This is-..." he shrugged helplessly. 

"That is a hindrance?" 

Connor regarded Hank with wide eyes. He couldn't be serious! 

But Hank grinned and winked. 

"The only hindrance I see is your awkward behavior. Slap him all over the face with androids purposes and such. When he tried to tell you that he is not disgusted by your physics."

Connor blinked faster. His mouth felt dry. Was Hank saying what he thought he was? 

"You think-... I mean… "

"I  _ think _ I have no idea. Hell I don't even know the guy very well. Can't say I like him either."

Connor's heart sank - so to say. 

"All I know is that there is just one way to find out how your chances are."

Connor looked up again, gazing at Hank with big, trusting eyes. The human shrugged. 

"Gotta ask him out."


	9. Tries

**June, 30th, 2039**

_ 'Gotta ask him out.'  _

That sounded way easier than Connor felt it was. He did some research on what 'going out' entailed and a lot of it didn't apply to him. Like going out for dinner or drinks. He didn't eat or drink, except the occasional thirium sip. Dancing wasn't something he had ever done and to see a movie seemed silly, that was something he had experienced with Hank and as much as he liked his friend it wasn't what he wanted with Captain Allen. Which lead to the fact that Connor had only a vague idea what he wanted from the Captain in the first place. 

There were things. Things that made his processor go nuts and send a ton of different sensations into his system. He remembered the movie Hank had shown him, the one about the two little deviant robots. How the one liked to link his claw with the other's. At the thought of Captain Allen taking his hand to simply hold it Connor felt warm and excited all over. If the human would like to do that? Or was that something that only appealed to robots? 

And there were other things. Things he had seen in the memories of the Tracis. Things that he shied away from even in his mind because they were so foreign and disturbing and came along with so many feelings that he had a hard time to process. Like rubbing his whole body against the Captain's. Naked. 

Connor hid his face behind his hands. An utterly silly and meaningless behaviour regarding the fact that a) he was alone on Hank's couch deep in the night and b) the scenario was in his head, so a shield from the outside didn't make sense. And still, the wish to hide even from himself was so strong. He didn't even have genitals!

What had Hank said? He looked up, gazing into the darkness.  _ It makes one vulnerable _ . That much was true. He felt vulnerable and open and at the mercy of his feelings and the captain's. And cringy. 

And still… there was no other way than forward.  _ Ask him out.  _

Connor licked his lips nervously. He couldn't do that if he only had such a vague idea what a relationship could entail. But… there was something he could explore, wasn't it? Something hidden in the memories he gathered in the Eden Club. Something he maybe dared to explore without feeling the need to switch off. Some customers seemed to have been eager to put something in the Traci's mouth. Body parts. He recalled the memory, watched out of the Tracis eyes, felt what they had. 

Connor switched of the memories and looked around the nightly apartment. The only sound was Sumo's snoring and, behind his bedroom door, Hank's. 

Connor tentatively lifted a hand and placed a finger on his own lips. It immediately sent a jolt if electricity through his system. His whole mouth area was very sensitive and equipped with a wide range of sensors to gather and process data. And since he became deviant, it was a source of different feelings too. His fingertip wetted on a trace of fluids and slid over his bottom lip. The feeling made his thirium pump speed up a little. His upper lip was even more sensitive, let alone his tongue. What if… what if Captain Allen would put something in his mouth? Maybe his own finger… Connor's fingertip pushed between his lips and he closed them around it. He closed his eyes, sighing soundlessly. Here, in the dark he could almost,  _ almost _ , imagine it was Allen's. He closed his eyes and sucked. 

It felt good. Incredible even. He pushed the finger in deeper, pressing down on the tip of his tongue. Slid it around the digit. More sensations. He moaned softly around the finger in his mouth. 

More. He needed more. 

A second tip slipped in between his lips and Connor dreamily explored the new sensations. Feeling the inside of his mouth, wet with fluids, his tongue playing with his fingers. Would Allen like this? 

The sensations became more and more intense. Without knowing it Connor let himself fall against the backrest of the couch, slurping sounds escaping him while he sucked his fingers more intensely, pushed them in and out, pushed them deeper. His body felt hot, electric, the nerve endings on fire, a knot in his lower body that grew tighter and tighter. 

A cold spot on his free hand made him jolt upright. He gasped, the fingers falling from his mouth. Tingling sensations ran over his body, the thirium pumping fast through him, spreading the strangeness. Slowly he recognized that Sumo was close to him, pushing his nose against his hand, the head tilting in question. Hank's friend was making strange noises and the dog had checked on him! Connor gaped down at him and a bubbling feeling in his chest. It grew stronger and stronger until it found a way out in form of a laughter. He laughed and laughed until Sumo started to barf with him, wagging his tail happily. 

"What in the  _ unholy _ fuck-..." Hank stood in the doorway to his bedroom, hair standing up in all directions. It only made Connor laugh harder. 


	10. Dates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One needs to walk through the dark to stand in the light...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, thanks to your overwhelming feedback I'm super inspired and write like mad so here we go! Love you all! ❤️💙

**July, 6th, 2039**

Connor tightened his tie. He swallowed. Nervousness pumped through his body. But he was determined. This was the way to go on about it. 

The morning sun illuminated the DPD main room, making it bright and almost cheery. This early only a few people were around. Connor looked over his shoulder where Hank watched him from his desk. The human lifted a thumb. 

Straightening his shoulders Connor stalked towards the cafeteria, where Captain Allen had entered 56 seconds ago to get his usual morning coffee. 

Nobody else was around, exactly like Connor had calculated. He righted his tie again and stepped forward. 

"Captain Allen?" 

The man in question turned. As soon as he recognized Connor, the smallest hint of a smile started to play around his left mouth corner. 

"Good morning."

"Good morning Captain." Connor hesitated a millisecond, but then manned up and stepped closer. Allen got a slightly irritated expression when the android stopped in front of him, looking down on him. 

"I have to ask something."

"Sure. Go ahead."

Connor inclined his head a bit searching for words. Long he had thought about the perfect date, something unique and interesting, an proposal that Allen could not decline. 

"I want to ask you to meet with me after work." 

Allen blinked. His face colored a bit.

"Uhm-... what do you have in mind?" 

"I want go over some cases we encountered. There are some flaws we need to discuss." Would Allen accept? Connor was so tense he didn't even smile.

Allen however, deflated visibly, but then nodded. "Of course-... Why not. Ah… I'm free today."

"Perfect." With a nod Connor greeted and left, stalking back to his desk. 

This had been smooth. 

Very smooth.

He was proud. 

*

The day went over and Connor busied himself. 

Hank left at five and headed home, holding his thumbs for the android and his first romantic encounter. 

His evening was quiet, a walk with Sumo and after that zapping through various TV shows. Not that he took in a lot, too much was he distracted by checking the phone, the clock and the news constantly. 

It was after eleven when the door to the house finally opened. Hank got up from the couch, grimacing at his creaking back. Connor shuffled in and the lieutenant immediately detected the slumped shoulders and the bent down head. 

"How did it go?" he asked, worry all over his face. "You're not looking exactly like walking on air." 

Connor rubbed his nose on his sleeve, to embarrassed to even look Hank in the eye. 

Hank got truly worried now. "What happened?! Didn't he come?!" 

"He did." Connor sniffed. 

Hank stared at him. 

"And…?"

"And he brought _the whole team_ and we spent the entire evening to discuss every single android related case we worked on for the last months!"

Connor looked as if he was ready to cry. Hank pulled him close, not for the first time asking himself why he had to quit drinking. 

**July, 15th, 2039**

That fucking android. 

Gabriel shook his head. Connor was a mystery to him and it annoyed him to no end that he thought about him so damn much. Since the raid he behaved like an entitled little shit. Calling in a meeting high-handedly to point out what his human colleagues missed. Always walking around with that air of untouchability and easy confidence. It was as if he tried to shove into his colleague's face that in all cases androids were better in everything. Maybe the repair had left him a bit crazy. Gabriel wouldn't know. But whatever it was, it started to grate on his nerves. 

No matter if they had combat training or sniper practice, or simply a briefing for a mission to come. 

"It's not that difficult, Captain. I just _aimed_ ." he had said with that typical little tilt of his head after he had shot three bullets right through the bullseye. Through the _same_ fucking hole. 

Swot! 

It couldn't go on like this. Some of the other team members started to grumble about it. He had to solve the problem before it became a bigger issue. Smooth out the waves. 

But how? Talking to Connor wasn't easy at the moment. Closed of like an oyster he was. Gabriel opened up his computer to check for a solution, at best a quick one. 

*

"I think we move forward. I simply try to show my best sides. At some point he needs to recognize it, right?" 

Hank didn't look convinced. "Do you now."

"Yes! I decided to always give my very best. To be a valuable part of the team. He is going to like it, right?" 

Hank rolled his eyes. 

"What? What is on your mind lieutenant?" 

"Nah. I just thought-..." Hank grimaced. 

Connor's puppy eyes didn't make it easy to decline. Hank sighed. "Back then, when I met you, you tried to make everything right. Textbook right. Yes!" 

Connor nodded happily. 

"God I _hated_ you. Uptight little shit, that's what I thought. But maybe Allen's into it…" 

Connor's shoulders fell.

"Ah, com'on. It will be okay. Just… just try to loosen up a little, okay?" 

*

For the rest of the day Connor tried to focus on other things. The ride home was - except for the blaring music - a quiet one. 

Connor sat beside Hank and looked outside. Nature was in full bloom, people started to spend more time outside. Difficulties arose. People had relied on androids for so long that they often forgot barest necessities. Bags were left behind on benches, people rudely ordered immediate attention from others instead of asking politely and so on. Connor sighed and let his eyes roam over the busy streets of Detroit. 

Still, there were also changes. The android housing proceeded and more and more signs appeared to raise awareness for the new world. Android parking spots disappeared, changed for slogans like 'Androids are people too'. Some of them were smeared over with grafities. Some people wished for the former situation to return. But all in all it was a slow process to bring androids and humans together in a new way. 

"Shall I drop you at the community center?" 

"That'd be nice, thank you." Connor gave back but his tone conveyed that he wasn't exactly happy about the prospect. 

Hank grumped and turned the car around a corner, driving to said place. 

The Heilmann Recreation Center organized the Human-Android-Conversation, an event where humans could learn about androids and the other way round, and how to coexist. Connor spent one evening every month here, to attend the meeting since his programming enabled him way more in this area than others. Today however, Connor wasn't in the mood to go, too much was his own human-android-conversation lacking at the moment. Only the fact that Josh always was disappointed when he didn't made it held him back from asking Hank to simply drive home. 

"Well, look at that…" Hank murmured when they drove onto the parking space and then Connor saw it too. Standing in front of the community center, studying the sign with the room numbers was… 

… Captain Allen


	11. Community

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel Allen learns about androids

**July, 15th, 2039**

The Heilman Recreation Center housed various rooms for the people of the quarter to meet, exercise or educate themselves. The Human-Android-Conversation rented a small room there to gather each first Thursday of the month. The meeting consisted of short speeches or lectures about a topic, followed by a discussion. Afterwards, a get-together provided space to talk one-on-one or in small groups. 

When Connor left the car Captain Allen had already entered the the building. The android followed without drawing the human's attention, watching the captain looking around, searching the signs for the correct room. To Connor's delighted surprise Allen indeed was here for the same purpose as he himself and entered the small room to find a place in the last row. Connor followed, walking past behind him and sat down on the other end of the row. Allen, surprised to see him, straightened his posture. Connor nodded with a smile. 

They were late, the room was already full - which meant that about half of the seats were occupied. In front of Connor sat a couple, he was a human and she an android, holding hands. He smiled to himself.

Josh stepped onto the small platform and stopped behind the lectern. His eyes changed when he connected with the speaker. 

"Good evening and welcome to the Human-Android-Conversation. I'm glad to see some new faces among us."

He started on some news, his calm voice engulfing Connor and make him relax into his seat. From time to time he gazed at the captain from the corner of his eye. Allen seemed to listen intently. His expressive face showed different emotions when Josh reported certain difficulties the androids still faced in everyday life, like the fact that Cyberlife was the sole provider for thirium and thus had a lot of power over the population and their wellbeing. 

The second speech was given by an android who still lived with the family he had worked for before the awakening and he explained that it could be beneficial to remain in service. Many androids only knew service and faced a lot of difficulties to organize their lives on their own. Connor knew from himself that he might have spiraled into chaos if it hadn't been for Hank who'd took him in and gave him a chance to learn to live a life. 

"Does anybody else want to speak here today?" Josh asked and looked around. Connor gazed at Captain Allen, how sat hunched down, head between his hands. He doesn't seem to be happy about what he had heard here today. 

Connor raised his hand. 

*

"Connor. Yes please, come up front."

Gabriel looked over to where the android in question rose from his seat and walked to the lectern. At first Gabriel had cursed internally when he had seen Connor. It felt as if he had been caught doing something slightly unsavory in coming here. As if he was spotted in an anonymous alcoholics meeting or such. But then the talks had started and Gabriel had listened. And forgotten about his embarrassment. 

"Thank you Josh." Connor turned to the crowd, the slight smile Gabriel knew so well playing around his full lips. "I'm glad to have the opportunity to speak here again and I don't want to make it too long. Can't keep you from the refreshments."

Many people chuckled. Who would have guessed, Connor had a fine sense of humor. He continued. 

"I wanted to address an issue that is on my mind for long now, and at the same time only for a short span. And that is exactly what I'm talking about." He interrupted himself and cleared his throat. As if he could for real have an itch, Gabriel thought, but then halted. For the first time he noted how much effort Connor put into being 'more human'. He had always seen the points where it didn't work out. When it did, it mostly wasn't visible. Unobtrusive. 

"My body is that of an adult. I'm a responsible person, I know about laws and expectations and what living together is about. Maybe I even possess more information about such things. Exabyte of information to be exact." Again, some people chuckled. "But… this knowledge is  _ uploaded _ . It isn't less real or justified, this is not what I'm talking about. It's more like… even if I'm an adult person in many regards, I learn like a child in others. Especially those parts that occurred when I became deviant."

Connor continued to explain what he meant and Gabriel found himself sitting up straight. He never had thought about it that way.

"It is simple to follow orders. But complicated to decide for yourself. Especially such simple things that humans learn and explore while being kids, teenagers, adolescent. So what I'm asking for is… patience." Connor looked in his direction. "Most of the things I do at least are simple trial and error strategies. And… I'm sorry if I'm offending."

Gabriel felt his cheeks start to burn. He felt shamed and embarrassed by his own behaviour during the last weeks. He got up from his seat when Connor left then lectern and exited the room before the android was back at his place. 

*

As soon as Connor returned to his row he recognized the empty seat where the captain had been sitting before. It took the wind out of his sails that the man had left so quickly. Maybe because he had already been bored, maybe because of what Connor had said. He hung his head. 

To his luck the speeches part was over quickly after and he could excuse himself from the get-together. He slipped out of the door and into the gloomy hallway where the sounds of the conversation were only a quiet murmured behind the door. Slow steps carried Connor along the linoleum floor to the stairs. He decided to not call Hank, but walk home to think and sort his memory drive. There was no need to bother his friend again with those useless feelings Connor carried around like baggage. 

His feet made quiet sounds on the way down, but he stopped short when he saw the person waiting at the foot of the staircase. 

Captain Allen. 

The man gave him a lopsided smile and straightened from his leaning position. 

"Hey Connor."

Connor swallowed. His mouth felt a bit numb. "Yes?" he managed. 

The human looked at his feet, than to the side. "I wondered… if you maybe wanna take a walk with me. It's still warm. We could take the route through the park?"

Warmth spread in the android and he felt his mouth curl into a bright smile. 

"It would be a pleasure."


	12. Walk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor and Gabriel clear some things up.

Behind the community center laid a small park. It wasn't in fact more than a meadow with a couple of trees, but small pathways wound through it and some benches invited to linger. 

Connor walked beside Captain Allen, watching the evening sun play with the leaves. The air was becoming warmer and different scents tickled his nose. The Captain was quiet, but it was a companionable silence, relaxed and somewhat friendly. 

"I could walk you home if you want. You live with Lieutenant Anderson, right?" 

"Yes Captain."

"You can, uhm… call me Gabriel. If you want."

Connor glowed. But then he backpedaled. "Maybe in private. It would not feel right to call you that in the office. If that's agreeable with you."

Allen raised his eyebrows, but seemed not offended. He nodded. 

They walked in silence for a while. 

"I like to do that. Just taking a walk. I often do it after work. Helps me clear my head."

"I like it too." Connor gave back. He gazed at Allen from the side. "Maybe we could… do this. Together. From time to time. When our schedules fit?"

Allen smiled at him. "I'd like that."

*****

It almost was dating. 

A form of dating where Connor didn't have to think about food or drink or how to dance. It mostly was them walking side by side along a park or one of Detroit's nicer streets. They didn't even talk much, just spent time in each other's company. 

Still, Connor learned more about Captain Allen. That he was a single child and had no family left. That he basically lived for his work and didn't felt very confident in socializing with others outside of professional settings. That he tried to learn more about the android movement. It became surprisingly easy for Connor to relax in Allen's proximity, and the more he did the better they got along. He could ask when he didn't understand or was unsure how to interpret a certain behaviour. Allen did the same. The more they walked and talked the more they shared smiles, small jokes, even playful banter. Still Connor respected Captain Allen - in his mind he always called him that - way too much to be truly sassy with him. But he loosened up around him. 

**July, 27th, 2039**

"Seems to go quiet well for you two, hm?" Hank asked when Allen had left their desk. Connor, who gazed after him turned. 

"Huh?" 

"He asked you out again, didn't he?" 

Connor looked at his desk wand started to sort some already sorted papers. "Yes. Today we clock out at the same time. And he asked me if we walk together."

"Uhu."

Connor looked up, worried. Was Hank unhappy with the development? To his utter relief Hank gave him a lopsided grin. He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. "He is good to you, yes? Don't wanna find me in the need to give him a shovel talk."

Connor furrowed his brow in question but then shook his head. "I'm not entirely sure what that means." he huffed. "But to answer your question: all we do is walk. And talk. No need to be worried."

Hank hank-faced at him and nodded. 

Lately Connor felt all excited when he was about to meet Captain Allen, but somehow he didn't want to tell Hank about it. Not now. It was all too soon and to fragile. He wasn't even sure what it was that enfolded between him and the captain, but whatever it was, it filled him with excitement and joy. 

*

Connor righted his tie before he stepped out of the DPD. Allen already awaited him, his jacket over his arm. Together they set off to their joined stroll. It wasn't far to the West River Walk, only a couple of bus stations. Connor got in behind Allen up front and followed him to a spare seat. 

Before he could sit down however, something shoved against his shoulder. A tall man had gotten up from his own seat and now blocked Connor's path. The android eyed him for a second, irritated since the bus was already moving again, and then tried to sneak past him. But the man shoved him again, this time with obvious purpose. 

"Out of my way, plastic!" he barked. He was a bit taller than Connor and broader. Aversion spoke out of his gaze. "You should ride in the back compartment, where you belong." 

"Excuse me…?" hadn't that guy gotten the message? "According to the law I'm able to find my seat wherever I like, sir."

"Fuck that law!" the man shoved him again, so hard this time that Connor couldn't keep his balance while the bus drove through a curve and fell against another seat. The man raised his fist, obviously just waiting for the slightest provocation to start a fight. 

A hand on his shoulder halted him. 

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

The man turned to Captain Allen, sneering at him. "And what are you going to do about it, huh, tin lover?" 

But Allen simply raised his eyebrows. "Me? Nothing."

The man huffed, irritated. He attempted to turn to Connor again, but Allen's chuckle held him back. 

"What's so funny?!" 

"The fact that you're about to hit a RK800. It's a combat model, designed for fighting criminals bare handed." Allen chuckled again. "I'm very curious how long it will take for him to fold you in half."

Connor straightened his posture and glared at the man, who seemed suddenly much more hesitant. 

The bus stopped at the next station. 

"Ah fine. I'm on my stop anyway!" he barked and shoved Connor to the side to leave. The android watched him go and then straightened his tie. Allen proceeded to his seat. 

Connor sat down next to him. 

"Thank you."

"Sure."

*

They didn't talk until they reached the park by the Detroit River. Connor needed time to process what had happened anyway. It was the first time that he experienced such behaviour from a random stranger. The way Allen had intervened warmed him though. It didn't take much to let an android have an agenda on its own, but it also could be taken away carelessly very quickly. And Allen had shown that he was an ally, not a master. 

The sun shone down on Connor when he leaned against the rail of the promenade. Above the seagulls cried. Close to the water one could see Canada on the other side. He walked side by side with Allen, watching the anglers who sat beside their fishing rods. 

"Is it often like that?" Allen asked out of the blue. Connor who had his hand above his eyes to shield them from the sun while he watched some dogs playing on the grass turned to him. 

"You mean with people like that?" He thought a moment. "No. I often ride with Hank. But I think for others… they encounter such more often."

Allen's face darkened. "Sucks."

"Yeah."

They walked a bit more in silence. Finally they sat down on a bench that overlooked the water and was a bit secluded from the busy meadows. There Connor turned to Allen again. "You know…even if I encounter people like that. I try to focus on the humans I get along with. Like Hank. And you." He smiled warmly. 

Captain Allen's face did that thing again when his expression didn't change much, but his cheeks became warm. Connor suspected it was a good thing. 

They sat next to each other on the bench, the summer evening surrounding them with warmth and orange light that was reflected on the waves. Connor looked down on Allen's hand. It rested relaxed on the wood while the man was lost in his own thoughts. Connor licked his lips. Slowly his own fingers crept closer. Thinking about the robot-movie again he dared to try the next step. Slowly, carefully, as if he expected to be pushed back, he placed his fingers on Allen's. 

The man turned to him and Connor felt his pump regulator stop for a moment. A moment that stretched into eternity. Until Allen smiled and closed his hand around Connor's. 

Connor looked at his feet, a silly smile playing around his lips. Above them, the seagulls cried. He had never heard a more beautiful sound. 


	13. Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get into motion...

**July, 31th, 2039**

It was an warm evening, the air humid and heavy. Even Connor felt uncomfortable, the humidity making his clothes stick to his skin. And that feeling doubled while being in close proximity to many humans, perched in a too small place. Currently he attended a meeting held by captain Fowler. The man swiped a napkin over his broad forehead to get rid of the sweat. The projector hummed quietly, unaffected by the stale air, presenting the relevant evidence in the 'plastic killer case'.

"So that's it. Even if different body parts are cut off we can assume that it is the same culprit because everything has the same handwriting. But we found different fingerprints on each victim." He shook his head. "Hopefully it's just a case of contaminated evidence and not copycats." 

The meeting had been scheduled because two new cases had emerged within the last three days. Two more androids without any connection to each other, murdered in the most gruesome way. 

Connor watched the photos and was glad that he had no bowel or else he would have felt the need to empty it. 

"All of you are informed now. Keep your eyes open." Fowler looked at Connor and it seemed as if he wanted to say something more, but then didn't. 

"Dismissed." 

The group littered out the room. It took some time since way more people had pressed in than the briefing room was meant for. Connor let himself be swept forward, hanging to his own thoughts. Every officer who had to do in the slightest with android cases was informed about the murder in order to spread the observation as wide as possible. 

"So… you're already scared shitless, hu?" Gavin bumped against his shoulder, a nasty grin on his unshaved face. 

Connor raised one eyebrow. 

"Since I don't possess the matching organ I'm  _ always _ 'shitless' Detective Reed."

Gavin grimaced. "Uh, Connor, gross!" 

"You started on-..."

" _ Never _ mind! Hopefully no tin opener comes too close eh? Don't want to find your corpse like those."

"That's  _ enough _ , Reed!" Hank shouldered between them and shoved Connor out of the briefing before he could reply. Gavin watched them go, his brow furrowed. 

"He can't leave it be, can he?" Hank grumbled to himself while he accompanied Connor to their desks. 

"Don't worry about him, Lieutenant. As much as detective Reed likes to pretend to hate me… I know he doesn't anymore."

Hank's eyes widened while he sat down. "So?" How comes?"

Connor shrugged." Call it a gut feeling."

*

The rest of the day Connor analyzed the known information about the plastic killer. Ten androids had fallen victim to them by now, no connection visible. One wasn't even deviant. Each victim had wounds where the murderer cut of body parts. Those biocomponents were nowhere to be found. But there wasn't a pattern. Sometimes they took optical sensors, sometimes they cut out a component from the body, something that wasn't visible. Each victim had the thirium regulator destroyed and died because of loss of blue blood. 

There was no connection. A part was missing and thus the case denied to open up under Connor's physical simulation software. It was… frustrating! 

"Oi, Connor."

He looked up. Hank pointed with his chin to the other side of the room. The androids gaze followed the gesture. Captain Allen stood by the first desk, his jacket over his arm, obviously waiting for him. Warmth that had nothing to do with the weather spread in Connor's core. 

"I-... uhm. I'll go and…" he pointed at the entrance. Hank grinned. 

"Of course. See you tonight."

Flustered but happy Connor shut the computer down and got up to meet his  _ date _ . 

*

Today they walked through Mt-Elliott-Cemetery, enjoying the huge old trees and the calm atmosphere. They talked a bit about the briefing and the actual case but Gabriel steered away from it soon. No point in walking to come down from the job's stress just to talk about it all the time. 

"So you like animals? I recall you talking about Anderson's dog."

"Yes. I think they are fascinating. Especially the ones who form a bond with humans." 

Not many people were around. The air became more and more thick, the barometric pressure rising. Gabriel looked up to the steel grey clouds that massed together behind the old trees. He touched an old scar above his temple, hidden under his hair. It would rain soon, maybe even a thunderstorm was coming their way. 

"Is everything okay?" 

He looked up. Connor gazed at him with his inquisitive eyes. Always so attentive, curious. 

"It's the weather. It's changing. Hopefully we will make it back without getting wet."

Connor looked up, observing the clouds.

"You can sense the weather changing?" he asked, wonder in his voice. 

Allen grimaced. "Yeah, amazing huh? Not only androids have sensors."

Connor wasn't offended. "Let's hurry then."

Of course the wind intensified as soon as they moved one foot in front of the other. Whistling gusts made the trees whoosh loudly, swirling leaves around in front of the quickly darkening sky. Even Connor's lock flickered in the upcoming storm, the coattails of his jacket flapping harshly when both men started to run. 

*

Thunder crashed above and it started to pour as if the world was about to drown. 

Already wet to their bones they barely made it to the safety of a ledge on a small building. The door was barred but between two pillars, close to the concrete wall both found at least a little shelter. 

Darkness engulfed them and the rain became a heavy curtain, turning the small place under the roof into a isolated spot. Allen pressed against Connor to keep his back from getting splattered by the rain. His breath brushed over Connor's cheek. The android could taste him in the air. They were so close, he could feel the human's warmth through his soaked clothes, the beating of his heart mirroring the rhythm of his own thirium pump. 

Allen's eyes hung on Connor's, slowly falling to the androids lips. 

He closed the distance. 

Connor gasped and in the very last second he turned his face to the side. 

Allen blinked. He drew back a little, different feelings sliding over his face. Confusion. Disappointment. 

Hurt. 

Connor hurried to explain, the right words escaping him. 

"I'm sorry, Captain-..."

"No it's okay." Allen tried to bring more space between them. He clearly was about to draw back completely. 

Connor felt his artificial guts fall into a bottomless pit. 

"No! Please…" 

Green eyes met his. Confusion. A little hope. 

"It's not like that. I'd love to. But I'm… sensitive. Very,  _ very _ sensitive." Connor tried to explain. 

Allen's brow furrowed. His confusion spread. 

How to get that across?! 

"My mouth was designed to analyze evidence. The sensors are very finely tuned and if it's stimulated I get… very excited. Like…  _ very _ excited." Connor looked down, feeling embarrassment rising into his cheeks. 

To his surprise Allen's cheeks colored too. "You mean like-..." 

"Yes. Like  _ that _ . Like if you'll get stimulated in more… private parts."

Allen looked at him. His gaze wandered to Connor's mouth again, the full lips, slightly parted. 

"That's… kinda hot."

Connor looked up, astonished. 

"You think so?"

Allen, clearly flustered, but grinning nodded. "Yeah."

Connor chuckled. He felt embarrassed, but not in a bad way.

"To be honest. I'm very happy that you tried to kiss me Gabriel. Maybe you could do it… here?" He pointed to his cheek. 

Allen's smile became warmer. He leaned in, slowly. Breath brushed over Connor's cheek and made him shiver. 

"Here?" The softest touch caressed Connor's cheek. He made a small sound that was almost a whine. 

"Or here?" Allen's lips wandered to his jaw, placing a soft kiss there. Then Connor's chin. His other cheek. The lips slid over the androids skin, spreading tingling sensations that reached deep into his core. 

When Connor opened his eyes he felt like glowing. 

"This… is so intense. I think my main processor is about to shut down." 

Allen laughed. "I must admit. I never received a compliment like this." 

They smiled at each other. Their fingers intertwined, keeping them connected in their small bubble of tender feelings, surrounded by the buzzing rain. 


	14. Evidences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor investigates the crimes against androids.

**August, 3rd 2039**

The android was dead, that much was sure. 

Somebody had used a saw to spread his chest open, the wires and cables hanging out. Despite that the victims face looked calm. He laid on his back, both hands placed on his lower belly, directly under the opening, as if he held himself together there. It almost had an artistic quality, despite being so gruesome. 

The murder must have used much force because thirium had splattered around, making the dead body look winged to an eye who could see the bright blue traces. The aesthetics suffered of course once the viewer took into consideration how much the android must have suffered. His tongue was missing and behind the eyelids only empty sockets were left. Whoever had murdered the poor being had taken the long road. And afterwards draped the victim like a sacrifice in an abandoned house. 

A homeless had found it and alarmed the police - luckily, because many people still didn't consider an dead android a case of crime. 

Connor looked down onto the body. Until now Fowler had tried to keep him out of the 'plastic-killer' cases, but since they couldn't find a clue who committed them more and more detectives got involved. 

Connor knelt down beside the corpse, scratching off a bit of thirium that wasn't visible for the human eye anymore. He licked the particles and furrowed his brow while data poured into his system. 

An MP500 household model, the traces of thirium on the floor about ten hours old. He analyzed. The corpse showed fingerprints but they weren't easy to define and those which he could identify didn't match the criminal record database. 

The thirium on the androids body, especially the stains on his face were even older, about twelve hours. The murder had brought the android here and killed him over a long time. Without restraining him in any way. Connor analized, processing data his sensors caught on to. 

The android had been deviant, he wasn't forced by his programming to follow orders any longer. He could have fought the attacker, fled. Why didn't he, but stayed and got himself murdered in a slow and - probably - painful way?

Connor got up. 

"Got something?" Hank came over from where he had questioned the homeless. The two of them had been reassigned for the time being. 

"I think so, Lieutenant." Connor's eyes still rested on the dead android. "Whoever did this… they know a lot about androids. And humans."

"Huh, what do you mean?" 

"If I'm right the killer cuts of different parts each time, but always removes the eyes, right?" 

Hank nodded. 

"A human would assume that this is part of a ritual, like cutting off the tongue. Like the killer is using their signature and communicates some kind of mental disorder." He made a pause and looked at Hank who still nodded. 

"You mean he tells us that he's a sick freak. Sounds about right."

"But what I didn't read in one of the files is that through the sockets the murder got easy access to the main memory storage. It's damaged in this model. Probably by using a screwdriver. I tried to connect to the storage, but it's busted completely. So there is no way to reload the last few hours this android lived through."

Hank eyed him varily. "What are you talking about?" 

"I'm talking about that the murder knows a lot about Android anatomy. They are an expert even. But I think… they doesn't have to be human. They could be an android themself."

*

"No way!" Fowler shook his head. "Why should an android murder his own kind?" 

"Humans do this all the time, Captain."

"'course! But… humans are not bound to logic. Androids are."

"Deviants are not."

"Are you really gonna tell me that we look for an android who murders other androids in some kind of sick ritual and then leaves human fingerprints all over the place to hide his traces!? Where does he get those prints then? I haven't been reported human citizens missing hands and fingers!"

"I don't know Captain. All I'm saying is that it is possible."

Hank rubbed his beard. "All we know about deviants is that they are way more compassionate, especially towards other androids."

Connor opened his mouth to reply, but Captain Fowler didn't let him. He pointed his finger into the android's direction. "Until you can proof me wrong in this regard you'd better look for another conclusion." He pointed to the door. "That's it. Now leave and find those evidences."

The Android closed his mouth again and left. Hank accompanied him to their desk. 

"Captain Fowler seems adamant about the murder being human." the android let out, as frustrated as possible.

"So? It's probable, no? Every single case of violence against androids since the new civil rights act was committed by a human."

"I know that, Hank. It's just-…" Connor shook his head, searching for words. Hank waited patiently. 

"It's just that I feel that if we take androids seriously, take them as people, we need to hold it possible that they do such things.

Hank watched him with raised eyebrows. Connor tried to explain. 

"We're used to view androids as passive. Patient, waiting for orders. As victims. But think about Ralph. He killed an homeless who came to close. The Tracis killed customers and so on. Of course all those cases were androids defending themselves, but…" 

Hank leaned on his own table, crossing his arms. "You mean that if we take androids for serious as people we need to suspect that they're capable of murder too?" He rubbed his beard. 

"Yes Lieutenant. That's exactly what I meant."

"Wow... I must admit. I had hoped you folks make it better than we do…?" 

"Why should we?" Connor asked, smiling mildly. "Humans created us."

Hank furrowed his brow. Then he shook his head and sat down. 

"Allen still out of town?" 

Connor, surprised by the sudden change of topic, sat down too, his face flustered. 

"Yes. He is. He'll be back next week I think."

"Well…" Hank, back in good spirits, winked. "Don't get yourself killed till then, huh?" 


	15. Bar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin has a moment, and then Allen and Connor too...

**August, 5th 2039**

Connor shut down the computer and sat leaned back in his chair. He sighed and pulled out the coin from his pocket. It wandered over his knuckles effortless as always, but he couldn't find real joy in it. His mind was elsewhere. 

He hadn't met Allen since the rain and he must admit that he missed him. His thoughts often strayed to that evening, the kisses on his face, the softness between them. He sighed again. 

"How about you stop the longing and come with us to the bar?" Hank asked from across the desk where he got ready to leave. 

"It's Wednesday again?" 

"Correct. Today it's the big round. Come on, don't be a party popper."

Connor sighed, suspecting that Hank wanted him to drive in the first place, but then decided that even if he didn't drink, it could be nice to follow along. Especially with Allen out of town and nothing to do than mope. "I never would, Lieutenant." 

"That's what I like to hear. Let's go!"

*

Abick's Bar was not only the oldest family owned saloon in Detroit but also notorious for his patrons consisting only of cops. The owner had adapted to that and most of the decoration, aside from some Irish memorabilia, was police-service related. Even a bulletproof waistcoat hung by the bar and rumor had it that the staff used it in case of a robbery. That only the world's most stupid criminal would try to rob a bar full of cops was another story however. 

Connor sat beside Hank and the green lights painted patterns onto his pale cheeks when he looked around. Wednesday, that was beer and shots and darts and pool-billiard with all the colleagues at Abick's. Even long lasting feuds like the one between Hank and Gavin rested for the evening, at least as much as it was possible for the two men. 

"How comes that tin-can is with us today?" 

"Reed…" Hank rumbled in a warning, but Connor smiled at him. 

"I was in the mood. Now that we all work together as a team."

Chris sat down his glass at his mention of the plastic killer case. "It's scary, isn't it? The thought that an android could be a mass murder."

Hank nodded but Gavin, who sat beside Chris, just snorted. 

"You can't be serious for once, can you-..." Hank began but Gavin, looking in his own beer, cut him off. "You know what? It's a wonder that not more androids become insane killers."

Everybody at the table stared at him. Even Hank was stunned into silence. But before anyone could wake from his stupor Gavin continued. "In the night of the freedom march… I had been assigned to duty in finding androids and deliver them to the camps." He looked up and stared at the others. It was rare that Gavin was this serious. 

Dead serious.

"I've  _ seen _ the camps. I saw what happened there-..." Gavin cursed. He grabbed his drink and without a word left. The group watched him march over to the other end of the room to the billiard table. 

"What was that about-... ?" Chris asked, as irritated as the android. 

Ben, the last member on their table sighed. "When he was a kid his parents immigrated. I remember that time, it's about twenty years ago. Illegals got crammed into camps. I don't know the full story, but-... He gets pretty nasty when somebody mentions stuff like that."

"Even more nasty than usual?" Hank mumbled but there wasn't much heat behind it. 

Connor watched him, his brow furrowed. He couldn't fathom how it must have been for a child to experience such. But that such an experience made someone into a murderer didn't sat right with him. Gavin - despite his hatred for the world and everybody living in it - was no murder. And Connor had talked to androids who had survived the camps and most of them were just… scared. Of course, they had software problems that resembled anxiety, depression and other issues. But it often affected themselves way more than their surrounding. 

No, the killer was not traumatized. The deaths pointed into another direction. Some kind of… search. 

The different victims of the case got actualized in Connor's memory storage. His random-access-memory buzzed and suddenly something clicked into place. He got up. 

Hank jerked away from the sudden movement, beer splashing over his hands. 

"Connor, what the-..." 

"Sorry Lieutenant. I need to go!" 

"Wha-... Wait. Wait for me will you!" 

With Hank on his heels Connor marched out of the bar. He needed to confirm his suspicion. Urgently. 

**August, 10th 2039**

"That's a neat interpretation. It fits with the evidences you told me about."

Connor glowed with pride when Allen complimented him. He had explained his theory in detail and the Captain had listened intently. 

"How will you find the murder though? They are the only one who can confirm if your theory fits."

"I'm not sure yet. But I think that understanding the thinking-pattern is a big step. If I'm right I may be able to predict the next victim."

Allen took his hand. He knew Connor enough by now to know that he was reckless. 

"Be careful, okay?" 

"Of course." Connor smiled warmly. He enjoyed to hold the human's hand while the continued their walk along the quiet street. It wasn't quite dark yet but the sun had disappeared behind the roofs and only an golden-pink glow was left above. It was pretty. 

"How have your travels been? I hope not to strenuous." Connor steered the topic to something else, since he didn't want to spent their precious time talking about work and gruesome murders.

"Nah, it was okay. It's quite a trip to Washington and back but I used the free time there to walk the city a bit." He looked at his feet, smiling. "Thought about you."

They smiled at each other. 

"By the way…" Allen stopped and gestured to the building they stood in front of. "This is where I life." 

Connor followed his gaze politely. Wasn't it nice that Allen introduced him to the house his apartment was in? But why? 

The captain however, looked flustered. 

"I wonder… if you wanna come up with me."

Connor blinked at him. 

"What for?" 

Allen groaned. "Uhm… I'd say a cup of coffee, but you're not drinking so… how about sex?" 

Connor gaped at him. 

His whole body felt as if somebody poured lava into it. His temperature was rising and this shouldn't even be possible from just a simple word. Even if the word invoked a endless string of connections in his processor and all of them added to the heat. If this was how sex felt before it even started he was in danger to melt some circuits, but that was a risk he was willing to take!

Allen, confused by his lack of reaction, back-pedaled a bit. "We don't have to. I mean, if you're uncomf-..."

" _ I'm not _ ! I mean… I'm not. We can. We can go and…" 

Relieved Allen took his hand again. "Okay. Follow me then."

And Connor did, feeling as if he had accidentally swallowed fireworks. 


	16. Intimacy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Allen and Connor take things a little further.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heavy Dom/sub undertones

The apartment was small, way smaller than Connor had expected from a man of Allen's rank. Not far from the entrance he saw a small pantry with two bar stools by the high counter that divided the space from the living room. Beside the pantry there was only a two-seat couch, a chair and a small table, a laptop resting on it beside a couple of used cups. Two doors led led to other rooms, but the layout of the living space didn't raise the idea that they would be way more spacious. Almost nothing decorated the place aside from a couple framed landscape pictures that showed mountains. 

Allen helped Connor out of the jacket and placed it on one of the bar stools. His hands however, stayed on the androids shoulders. Slowly he leaned in and placed a kiss on the hairline and another on the skin below. 

Connor shivered in a good way. 

"Captain…" 

"You like calling me by my title, huh?" 

Connor felt Allen's smile against his skin. Another kiss was placed over his spine. 

"I-... uh. I think so…"

Soft kisses mapped a path to the collar of Connor's shirt. 

"I like it too…" 

Connor closed his eyes, his mouth falling open a bit while Allen's mouth wandered over his neck. "What do you think…" he murmured in a voice that flew like silk over Connor's circuits. "... shall we continue this way?"

Conor licked his lips. 

"Okay." He looked over his shoulder and could not prevent his tone from sounding shy. "Take the lead, please."

Allen kissed his cheek, his mouth corner, the place close to his ear, until Connor relaxed. Then he pulled out the shirt from Connor's jeans with a slow but confident movement. The human's hands slipped under the fabric, fingertips caressing the skin on the android's waist. 

Connor shivered. A little moan escaped him. His ability to think straight left him more and more when Allen unbuttoned the shirt from behind, each bit revealing more and more of his artificial skin. 

With a boyish grin the man tucked on the collar, pulling it down slowly to reveal Connor's naked back. Kisses were placed on his neck, moving to his shoulder. 

Allen took the shirt away, dropping it on the same stool as the jacket. The man's hands placed themselves on Connor's shoulders, caressing down over his arms, his shoulder blades, his back. He even let Connor feel his fingernails a bit. 

"How is that?" 

"Uh… intense. I think-... I like it." 

Allen's mouth was back on Connor's neck, now leaving open mouthed kisses there, even licking over his spine. His hands caressed over the android's chest and belly. Such strong hands, Connor noted before the thought was chased away by the sensations. Allen's mouth found a specific place on his neck and Connor jerked upright with a loud moan when electricity chased down his spine.

"What was that?" Allen chuckled close to his skin while Connor felt his thirium pump speeding up. He gasped. 

"It's… it's my port. On my neck. Access port. Tender."

"I figured…" 

Allen liked over the place again and Connor moaned. His eyes fell shut when the man behind him started to suck on the place. RA9, it felt so good. 

A little push here and there and Connor felt himself maneuvered to the high counter that separated the pantry kitchen from the living room. Allen's hands gripped Connor's wrists and placed the android's palms against the wood. 

"Keep 'em there…" he whispered against Connor's neck, before he bit down on the skin over the port. Connor felt his knees go weak. His fingernails scratched over the wooden counter in a desperate attempt to gain more stability. 

More, he needed more. 

All that kept him upright at that moment was Allen's soft order to keep his hands on the counter. Everything else spiraled away into the turmoil of lustful feelings. 

Allen pulled down Connor's pants over his ass and opened his own. Then the android felt something hot and firm pressing against his lower backside. 

"Tell me if it's too much."

"Gnn… ah, Cap-... Captain…"

"Yeah that's it. You're such an good android, aren't you?" Allen rubbed against him from behind. 

It was so hot. Connor wished he could see it, see Captain Allen enjoying himself while using him. But he had been told to stay with his hands against the counter. And the praise felt so good. 

"Am I?" He gasped "Captain Allen, am I a good android?" 

"So good. Makes me so hot…" Allen gasped against his neck. He held Connor with one hand against his lower belly, pressed the android's body against his own, rubbing himself on Connor's ass. His other hand came up and placed itself on Connor's throat. "You're so good for me. I'll give you more." Allen's finger slid into Connor's gasping mouth. 

Sensations exploded behind the android's closed eyes. He sucked on the finger out of reflex, but nothing could hide the deep, guttural moan that escaped him. His hips pushed back against Captain Allen's groin. He needed more, more. 

Sucking the man's fingers, feeling his mouth on his neck, the man's heat between his buttocks. It was fireworks, electricity, _life_. 

Allen moaned. Heat splattered over Connor's lower back. The man behind him twitched with his orgasm, heavy breaths caressing the wet places on Connor's neck. 

The android moaned softly while his systems ran one check after the other. Every circuit was alive, every connection glowing. 

Allen pulled him around and the next thing his overloaded sensors recognized was the embrace. Allen embraced him, still panting, his heart hammering in his chest. Connor closed his arms around the human, hiding his smile against his shoulder. 

*

Gabriel left after one last kiss to Connor's neck and the android took the chance to gather his senses a bit.strange feelings mixed inside him when his memory drive analyzed the overload of data of the last thirty minutes. Even if it had felt so good, it was confusing and Connor filed it away to sort through it later. To distract himself from his growing unease he looked around for the first time. Captain Allen's apartment was… simple, so to say. Connor, who didn't need much himself, didn't find it odd but during investigations he had seen his share of living spaces, luxurious and more common ones, and Allen's was the role model for basic. 

Connor stopped investigating as soon as Allen appeared in the doorway of the bathroom, a moist washcloth in hand. He had taken the time to get his clothes back in order too and looked as sharp as ever, if a little heated up. 

"Here, let me clean you up…" he murmured and stepped closer. At this point Connor noted that he himself was still half naked, his pants pulled down over his ass and slick dripping down his back. 

"Thank you" he gave back as quiet as Allen and turned to let him wipe the traces away. 

Things had happened between them. Things he only could hope to decipher with much more time and calculation capacity. How Allen had moaned against his neck, how effortless he had taken advantage of Connor's sensitive mouth. 

"So, all done."

They were close, Connor's back almost touching Allen's chest. He felt the human's body heat against his skin. It was nice. 

"I don't know about you, but I could use a drink."

Connor turned at that and smiled. He watched Allen get a couple glasses and a bottle with amber liquid out of the pantry. His insecurity level rose further without the body contact and his hand found his neck to rub over the small bump where his port was. Who would have guessed that this tiny opening could be so sensitive. Especially since it only had use if somebody wanted to connect to the android's systems against their will. 

Connor looked up, his hand still on his neck. Another piece of the puzzle slipped into the right place. His eyes were wide when he turned to the approaching human. 

Allen was alarmed in an instant. "Connor-... ?"

"I-... I need to go!" Connor grabbed his shirt and slipped into the sleeves. 

Allen grabbed his arm, worry painted all over his face. "Connor. Did I-…" He obviously was concerned if Connor had disliked the experience. 

"I'm sorry I-... " too many data packages overlapped, different directives interfered with each other. The killer case. Allen's approval. Connor's mixed up feelings. 

All Allen could do was stand beside and watch Connor buttoning his shirt up messily while already moving towards the door. With the hand on the knob he stopped however. With two long strides he was back at Allen's side, pulling him close. His lips pressed on the captain's and the short contact send fireworks through his already overexcited body. 

"Thank you!" 

Allen was left behind, a mixture of confusion and worry playing over his features.


	17. Conclusion

Connor worked all night on the evidences, checking the victims, compared injuries and organized data about their jobs, when the became deviant and so on. At some point he received a distresses call from Hank. Since he had completely forgotten to inform the lieutenant about staying in the police station over night, Hank had been worried and wanted to know if he was still alive. Connor felt warm when Hank cursed at him for keeping him up all night, he knew it was out of worry. Right after he managed to calm Hank down however, he dove back into the files, focused on compiling and comparing information. 

Finally, around dawn, his calculation came to an end. Connor looked at the android corpses in front of him. Lists of biocomponents moved forward behind his inner eye. He was right. And the check on the neck-ports of each victim confirmed what he had suspected. 

Each and every single one had been violated from the outside. 

**August, 11th 2039**

"That's how he the murder makes the victim helpless." Connor held up a long, thin connector, resembling a thick needle. "It's inserted into an androids neck-port to run diagnostic if the android is out of order and no connection via other models possible. It can be used to paralyze the limbs. The victim stays conscious though."

Hank, growing a bit pale at that, eyed the connector varily. "But wouldn't an android notice if somebody attempts to stick such a thing into their neck?!" 

The other members of the task force mumbled. 

Connor nodded. "It isn't easy, that much is sure. And the victim would struggle. But that's the same as knocking out a human with a sedative. With the right setup to distract the victim and dexterity…" 

Captain Fowler didn't look convinced. "Alright. So all we gotta do is look for a killer carrying a long needle. Simple as that."

"I told you that they target a specific kind of victim. We need to take into consideration-..." 

" _ If _ it is an android we look for."

"Well, yes…" 

"Okay. Good work." Fowler patted Connor's shoulder. "Keep your eyes open everybody. As soon as we know where to dig it's a case for the SWAT. Until then you're dismissed."

Fowler left for his office and the group scattered, returning to different desks. Connor stayed behind, his mind racing. There was only one option. 

"A penny for your thoughts."

Connor's head snapped up at the deep voice. The last time he heard it, it had moaned against his neck and the memory made his thirium pump jump. 

Captain Allen leaned against one of the dividers. His face was serious, businesslike. With a short gesture of his head he ordered Connor to follow and left for the cells. Connor, nervously straightening his tie, followed. 

Captain Allen waited for him in a place that wasn't visible from the front except somebody walked over to the evidence room. For a second the android suspected (hoped) the human would want to steal a kiss or something ridiculous (sweet), but Allen's face was far too serious. 

"Yes Captain?" he asked when he came to a halt in front of the man.

Allen's eyes grew smaller. "You think about playing decoy for the killer, don't you?" 

Connor inclined his head. Captain Allen was right. "I must admit… the thought crossed my mind."

Allen's face darkened. "Well, it's a shitty idea."

Connor was taken aback. His ideas were logical and smart. "With all due respect, Sir. It's the only plan that has a chance for success." He had calculated that very carefully. "I possess some of the biocomponents the killer is after wich makes me a possible prey. But my problem solving module is way more advanced than the PC or PM models who work in police service. In opposite to them I'm able to predict the outcome of a sequence and act-..." 

"Bullshit." Allen brushed him off. 

Connor had never seen him so angry. Usually the man had a tight grip on his self-control but now he was obviously seething. And diminishing Connor's ability to plan the proceedings. His processor hummed with distress. Was this because of what happened the other night? Different interpretations appeared in Connor's range of vision: 

_ Capt. Allen is upset because I have left.  _

_ Due to recent behaviour Capt. Allen does not take me for serious anymore.  _

_ Capt. Allen does not want to support my case because we've been intimate.  _

He felt more and more agitated. His hand twitched restlessly, but the human seemed not to recognize it. 

Allen's finger pointed at Connor accusingly. "Hank told me you  _ died _ in the Stratford Tower. Your. Calculations. Aren't flawless, Connor!" 

A new interpretation popped up in Connor's visional field: 

_ Capt. Allen is worried about my well-being. _

He felt himself softening inside. This was… probable. And the man was right. He had died there, shot by a deviant in order to save Hank. And then sent back again by Cyberlife. But this time there was nobody who could send him back. If he died, it was final. 

"That makes me what? Human?" 

Captain Allen's eyes widened and his cheeks became red when his anger flared again, but Connor raised his hand, placatingly. 

"I understand your worry, Captain. I'm a member of your team and you care for your people. I can become wounded like every other police officer. But it is a decent tactic to use a decoy and I'm the only option." 

Allen stepped back. He crossed his arms. 

"I thought you to be more but just a member of my team Connor."

The android flinched. This had been misleading. 

"I hope I am, Sir," he conceded with a soft voice, lowering his eyes. But when he looked up again there was resolve in his gaze. "Regarding this plan however, I'm just that. A detective who wants to catch that killer


	18. Victims

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor investigates at the front lines

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay maybe you noticed the slower coming of chapters. This is due to the fact that the plot thickens and I had to rewrite large parts. But also due to recent events it's not easy to find the mood to write about cops. I think these are difficult times and I try to remember that fiction can do better than reality, but still... there is a sinking feeling. I can't even try to understand what happens out there, how it feels and how the people involved make it through. My thoughts and wishes are with them. I thought about if it maybe is unethical to write such a story in times like this. But I came to the conclusion that I will do it, with the hopes that cops like Hank Anderson and Gabriel Allen exist, somewhere.

**August, 21th, 2039**

It took Connor almost two weeks to connect the dots of each victims last days of living to delimit the hunting ground of the killer. Since only an android with RK abilities was able to do it, Connor naturally was on the front lines in the undercover operation to find possible prey on the area he predicted the next attack. 

With the rising tension of getting closer to the killer either Connor nor Allen had pursued the possibility to talk about what had happened between them the other night. They would, Connor hoped. But not right now. Allen had made clear that he wasn't fond of Connor acting as decoy, but Fowler had put his feet down in favor of the android. 

Right now he sat on a scratched counter, trying to scan his surrounding as secretly as possible. The so called A-bar laid in a shady part of Detroit where many androids had gathered to find a place to stay. Connor observed the quarter for some days now and had ended up in the crammed, run-down place. The owner of the A-bar had adapted to the new situation and now aimed mostly towards androids. The beverage-card consisted of second-hand thirium, oil, general-purpose grease or spray lubricant. On top one could try to buy cheap biocomponents without asking where they came from. With Cyberlife still controlling the majority of the production poorer androids had no other chance. 

Connor, disguised as a common deviant, sat by the bar and sipped his blue drink. If he had drawn the correct conclusions then every victim had visited this quarter during the last couple of months looking for a place to stay, thirium or components. It was highly probable that the murder picked them out here, maybe at this bar or a place close by. Maybe they pretended to sell parts, maybe they contacted the victims otherwise. 

Connor waited, watching the place as unobtrusively as possible and gathered data. It was two weeks now. Two weeks without a new victim. Two weeks where Fowler frowned on him and his observations. Two weeks where Hank got even more grey hair because he couldn't come along. A human would stick out like a sore thumb around here. 

Someone bumped against him, making him almost spill his drink. Connor turned. 

"Please. Can you help me?" The slender android looked at Connor with wide terrified eyes. "Pretend you know me! Somebody's following me!" Her LED spiraled wildly between yellow and red, back and forth. 

Connor scanned her. A GJ600, the components fit the list in his mind. Could it be that easy?! He leaned back a little since the android was close in his personal space and it felt uncomfortable - something he adopted from being around humans all the time it seemed. He smiled friendly and placed a hand on the other androids shoulder. 

"Hey, how are you? I haven't seen you in ages!"

The android relaxed a tiny bit. Connor could see the urge to turn her head but she didn't. Instead she hunched up her shoulders and came a little closer. She forced a smile on her face. 

"Can you walk me home please? I don't know who they are but I'm sure they even followed me here."

"Sure." Connor paid his bill and got up from the stool. She stayed close to him, looking around. None of the other patrons seemed to pay her or Connor any mind. 

When they stepped out onto the street it had already darkened. 

"What's your name?" Connor asked while they walked. She looked around, worrying her lip. 

"Mary." her face turned to him. "Thank you so much. What's your name?"

"Jason." he smiled down on her. "Where's your place."

"Over there." She pointed to a alley that led to a backyard. "I'm new in town. Heard that in Detroit androids can get jobs and a living. Haven't made much yet."

"Don't worry. There plenty of jobs," he reassured while they walked to the shady backyard. Only Connor's excellent night sight prevented him from running into things. 

"You live here in the backyard?" 

She laughed nervously. "That's why I didn't want to walk here alone. The lights are broken. It's a shitty place but… well. There is a small cellar apartment. It's not much, but, hey-..." she chatten in nervously. 

Connor leaned forward to pass under a wooden beam and that was when it happened. Her hand came up, the needle invisible in the dark. All he noted was the pinch when it sunk into his port and the voice of the other android, suddenly not frightened anymore. 

"Ups… sorry about that…" She looked down on Connor, playing with the connectors cable in her hand. Her face was calm but her eyes had this raptured expression that made a shiver crawl up his back when she gripped him under the arms and pulled him into the cellar. 

Obviously she wasn't the next victim. 

She was the plastic killer. 


	19. Awakening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Confrontation with the killer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so, so much for your nice words and your support. I hope the ongoing story satisfies!

It was cold. 

Snow gathered around Connor's feet, freezing into the fabric of his pants. He stood on a white plane, the surrounding obscured by the whirling ice crystals, but he recognized the place in an instant. Winter night in the zen-garden. 

Connor looked around, trying to peer through the rumbling white, ignoring the trembling of his hands as best as he could. It was so cold. 

He felt his skin freezing. He shouldn't experience this that much, he was a machine. But the cold crept into his artificial skin, into his plastic chassis and deeper, his wired insides and hardware. It was about to kill him! 

"Amanda?" This was her place. He had to find her! 

Panic throbbed in his chest. He made a small step without knowing where to go. 

A crack under his feet. 

Depth. 

He knew, the lake was small on the surface, but deep. Deep and cold. If he broke into the ice, nothing would save him. 

"Amanda!?" the panic seeped out of his voice when he turned around, searching. The darkness was only partly broken by lights, hidden behind the snow, Amanda nowhere to be seen. 

He remembered. She had left the garden, overtaken Connor's body, to kill Markus, to use the revolution like she had used Connor. He was a prisoner in his own mind, trapped… 

Hot panic swelled in his chest. He had to find the back door. He had to find a way out. He would die here! He would-...

*

Connor was slammed back into his body. He would have jolted but he couldn't move a single finger. Paralyzed by the connector in his neck. He could feel it, cold, probing on his vulnerable insides. He wanted to gasp, to move, to calm his heavy hammering thirium pump. But he couldn't. 

Gathering his willpower was sand streaming through his fingers. Different tasks appeared before his eyes, red raging alerts, trying to urge him into action that was denied to him. He had to calm down. 

He had. To calm. Down. 

This wasn't Amanda, this wasn't her garden. She had no longer power over him. 

This was the plastic killer. And she would kill him too if he couldn't get a grip on his raging panic! 

His eyes were open, he was on his back, each thought ripping through his mind like lightning through the night sky. 

A blotchy ceiling, dusty, cobwebs, barely visible in the dim light. Bare concrete under him, hard, little stones digging into his skin through his clothes. His sensors detected the smell of mold, dust, thirium. Processing those sensations anchored him in the here and now, making the red flashing alerts lessen, clearing his vision. 

Out of the gloomy dark, her face appeared above him, illuminated by his own red swirling LED. Her eyes traced over his face. 

_ You're different. _ Her voice sounded in his head through a connection she established with her hand in his skin. With it sensations she processed flooded his mind. How he laid there before her eyes, helpless. The place she had dropped him, a cleared corner in the cellar. No cheap apartment, just an abandoned place where nobody would see what she intended to do. His thirium run cold when he recognized that she  _ wanted _ him to feel what she felt. That she deliberately projected her twisted mind in his. 

Connor sweeped together as much control over his emotional responses as he was able to, to sound way more calm than he felt. _ I'm a specific model. Prototype. _

She leaned in more, curious.  _ I feel that you're terrified. But not because of me, aren't you? The readings are… different.  _

Well, he wasn't going to tell her the story about Amanda and how she once had rendered him helpless, wasn't he? 

_ I was looking for you.  _

A smile crept over her face.  _ Well. You found me, didn't you. And I found you. _ Her fingertips caressed over his cheek, touching his left eyeball. _ I  _ found _ you.  _

*

Gabriel, geared up in full SWAT uniform paced the inside of the small truck as best as the cramped space allowed. "He has left the bar twenty minutes ago."

"I know Captain", Baxter gave back. Her eyes rested on the screen in front of her, searching for a sign in the drones reading. "He hasn't send a distress signal yet."

"As if he would…" Gabriel muttered under his breath. "He thinks he can accomplish it on his own. Stupid android."

"He  _ is _ very capable, Cap…" 

He rubbed the bridge of his nose. That was true. Connor was not only sturdy and equipped for a fight, but also smart and clever. But still… the sinking feeling wouldn't leave him. Since Connor had accompanied the female android to the abandoned apartment complex his microphone was off. No sign, not a single peep from him since then. 

Twenty five minutes. 

Gabriel cursed soundlessly. 

*

All in Connor wanted to recoil. But he couldn't. His body was as useless as a dead object. 'Focus on your main objective. You're on a mission Connor, get a grip!' he scolded himself and deliberately counted to five, ignoring her touch as best as possible. He needed to confirm his suspicion on her. He needed a testimony. Luckily his internal recording counted as such in court. 

_ I know what you seek.  _

She pulled back, frowning.  _ Is that so?! _ The serene expression vanished into annoyance. The fact that her prey denied her the usual behaviour seemed to irritate her. 

Good! 

_ Yes. You seek certain biocomponents. All victims had that in common. _

She snarled at him.  _ You know nothing! _

_ #9745h, #4807, #1101j… _ Connor started to list the components he had found missing in the victims. 

_ STOP IT! _ Her anger burned through his wifi, the swirling LED on her temple bathing her distorted face in red lights. 

Connor waited. 

Slowly she calmed down again. She knew that she had her victim in her hands. No need to get angry. 

_ I like your eyes. _ She mused. 

'Optical unit #9745h' Connor thought to himself. A trait he shared with the victims.

_ You want them… not for yourself. Not for sale. You simply want them gone. And the androids who possessed them dead.  _

Her eyes widened. She moved closer again. Her fingers carded through his hair in an affectionate gesture.  _ You're a very smart one, are you not, prototype? _ She paused, looking at her own fingers. The rapture smile was back. _ I am an individual. But there are those like  _ you _. Who stole my parts. I can never be truly alive when I'm not the  _ only _ one.  _ She looked at him again.  _ The only one as an individual. _

'Software compromised. Circulating conclusions' Connor analyzed. She was damaged in her mind. Was there a treatment? He had no idea. Free androids were such a novelty, there was no precedent. Malfunctioning robots had been shut down until recently. But to find out if she could find help he had to help himself first. 

"I like the feeling when they die." It were the first words she said to him not over wifi but with her real voice since bringing him to the cellar. "I connect with you when the end is near. When your body gives up resisting. To lead you over to the next world. I love that part."

Okay maybe there was nothing that could be done for her. She seemed to be not only driven by her circulating logic but also had developed a preference for others to suffer. Connor felt growing disgust at her closeness and the connection of their minds via interface. It was like sticking his hand into mold moistness. At least it distracted him from the terrifying feeling of not being able to move, to not have any control over his body. 

_ I know all about you. The police knows all about you. They'll come for you to destroy you.  _

She pulled back, hatred crossing her face. "You really think you're smarter than me, right,  _ Jason _ ? But believe me, you're not the only one who samples data before striking!" she snarled at him. "You think I don't know that you work for the police? That I did pick you on a whim? That I don't know about the  _ little tracking device you carry _ ?!" 

Connor felt cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, bad cliffhanger. Don't worry, new chapter comes tomorrow. Hold your thumbs for detective Connor! :O


	20. Confrontation

"His signal is off!" Baxter cried out, her eyes searching the screens. 

"What- what the fuck?!" 

"He isn't on the screen any longer! Vanished into thin air!" 

Gabriel activated the com on his wristband, his free hand grabbing the helmet. "Okay guys, we go in. Officer in danger, code yellow."

He jumped out of the truck, two team members on his heels, three more leaving the other vehicle.

"But Cap-... With you going, who is in command?" Baxter asked. It was strange for the team leader to leave the commando point. But Gabriel gave her a hard look before donning his helmet. 

"Keep in touch. As soon as he appears on the screen, let me know. We search the building." 

"O-... Okay sir."

He gestured for the team to swarm. He would find Connor. And if he had to tear down the whole fucking complex! 

*

"Oh yes, little detective, I know about it. Who doesn't know Connor, the deviant hunter who became deviant himself." She snarled at him, her teeth reflecting the light of his panic LED. "My jammer interferes with your precious connection to your human friends. Nobody will disturb us…" 

She leaned away from him, searching for an item out of his sight. When her hand reappeared Connor wished he hadn't seen it. She held a metal spoon, sharpened into a weapon. Obviously she liked it the hard way. 

"Your optical unit belongs to me, dear." she said in a singing voice and leaned over him. Closer and closer the sharp edge came to his face, nearing his eye. She licked her lips. 

Connor's hand closed around her wrist. 

For a second none of them moved, just his power pressing against hers. Her eyes widened in a fit of rage. Connor's red LED reflected on her face of madness. 

"YOU CAN'T MOVE!" she screamed, unable to accept the obvious. Her second hand, balled into a fist, smashed into his temple. 

Connor felt his skin retract when his chassis got damaged. She was strong. He still fought her other hand who held the spoon. His knee connected with her side and with all the power he possessed he managed to imbalance her. 

They rolled over, fighting each other. 

Connor dodged her heel, it smashed into the ground where his face had been a moment ago. His hand found the connector, ripping it out of his neck. The vision clouded red for a second, static buzzing in his ears, enough for her to kick him into the stomach, making him fall backwards. The SWAT training came in handy now, Connor rolled over his shoulder and came to his feet quickly, taking a stance where he could defend himself better. His sensors scanned the room for weapons, traps, exits. 

"In the name of the Detroit Police I arrest you. You're suspicious for murder in twelve cases. You have the right to remain silent, but-..."

She laughed out loud. "Oh no. You don't. But you're right about the murder part… how about we make it thirteen?!" 

She gripped a long metallic object, looking like a makeshift crowbar with a sharp end. "Don't worry. It'll be over. Somehow."

*

"Cap. Signals that match those of an android coming from above. Top level." Pivo's voice sounded scratchy through the intercom in Gabriel's ear. The team advanced through an old stairway. 

This place gave him the creeps. Somebody had installed makeshift jammers, small inconspicuous devices, that disturbed the scanners for electromagnetic signals. They found them in each floor. The whole place was an android trap, like a giant spiderweb! 

The team swarmed the abandoned complex and this signal was the first sign for non-human life they got. He gestured for Pivo to move forward but the bad feeling in his guts grew stronger and stronger. The signal came from above. But it made no sense. The building had sixteen levels, it was higher than the neighboring sites. No escape route for the killer It felt… wrong! 

"Closing in."

A part of Pivo's vision was projected to Gabriel's helmet interface. He gave the signal and watched the officer open the door quietly. There was no fucking sound up here at all. If Connor was fighting the killer there had to be something! He could be injured, rendered helpless. The possibility that Connor was dead wasn't something Gabriel wanted to let through.

The door opened into a loft apartment, abandoned and full of rubbish. And there, in the middle laid something. Or someone. 

Pivo crept closer, the light on his gun searching the room. His sight, transferred to Gabriel's helmet landed on the unmoving heap. 

A dummy. An old android body, prepared as a digital beacon! A red light blinking slowly. 

"GET OUT! OUT, IMMEDIATLEY!" 

Pivo turned on his heel, jumping, but it was too late. The explosion hit him from behind, smashing his body into the hallway. 

*

He evaded the blow and the crowbar smashed into the concrete behind him, little fragments hitting his face. While she pulled back, he smashed his fist against her temple. She was a trained security model and recovered way too quickly, slamming the metal after his head. He ducked away. 

"Tell me! How did you overcome the paralyzing, prototype?" She circled him, tapping the metal against her hand. 

"There's always a backdoor!" he gave back while he evaded another blow. She had uploaded interesting combat routines, movements he had never seen before. Or was this the result of her compromised software? 

A distant sound made him perk up. An explosion?! Cold crept up his spine at the thought who had been hit by it. He knew the SWAT team waited for him, was probably searching the place by now. 

'Please, no…' 

She used his processing to her advantage. The sharpened metal spoon from before was in her hand for a second, then flying towards his face. All Connor could do was raise his hand to shield his sensitive head sensors. The metal pierced his skin, plastic and wires, error messages blooming red before his eyes. Thirium splattered to the ground. She advanced, the crowbar in one hand, a screwdriver in the other, grinning. 

*

Heavy combat boots thudded on the bare stairs when Gabriel made his way down. He didn't bother with trying to keep quiet. The trap had confirmed what he had felt in his gut all the way up. The killer wanted them to move upwards. They held Connor captive somewhere down there. Helpless. 'Don't let me be too late!' 

Two members of the team carried Pivo to safety, hopefully he'd make it. The others tried to follow their captain, who raced down the stairs like possessed. 

'God, please-...' he repeated in his mind with every staircase he took, down, down, into the darkness of the cellar. 

*

She was above him now, her legs pressing down on his arms. His injured hand was useless and his other trapped under her knee. Why was she so strong?! He should be able to overthrow her! But he couldn't! 

She stared down on him with glowing eyes. 

"I wanted to savor this! To take my time with you! To make you feel special! But if it's your wish to be slaughtered carelessly.." 

She raised the crowbar over her head. With her power she would smash Connor's head in when it came down. He wanted to close his eyes, avoid to watch it come close in slow motion, his last moments filling with it, but he couldn't. He had to watch how she lunged backwards, her mad eyes glowing… 

Shots! 

Three, four, five. 

Each of them hitting her body from behind. Thirium splattering on Connor's face. Her expression changing from mad rage to surprise, her eyes widening. Blue dripped from her lips. 

Then she fell to the side. The crowbar clattered loudly in the sudden silence. 

"Connor!" 

The voice engulfed Connor like a blanket. Even distorted by a helmet he would have recognized it everywhere. 

"Gab- Gabriel…" he cracked out. 

The human was above him, pulling the dead android away from him, freeing him of her weight. His helmet was gone and Connor looked into Gabriel's face, worry, fear, anger, a broad variety of human emotions playing over it. 

He smiled. 


	21. Repairs

Gabriel sat down in front room of the small repair workshop, taking a deep breath. Extant adrenaline hammered through nerves, as if he still was on that staircase. But they made it. All of them. 

Baxter's call had confirmed that Pivo was stable and in surgery now. It felt as if a weight was lifted from Gabriel's chest. He would check on him later, after his wife had seen him. 

Still in his combat uniform Gabriel leaned his head against the wall, closing his eyes. Just a moment to catch his breath, that was all he needed. The events of the last two hours passed before his inner eye. The abandoned house, the the trap, Connor in the cellar, under attack. How he had gotten him out in the last possible minute while Pivo had been already carried off to the hospital. 

At least, this time Connor wasn't injured that bad, just a couple of smaller wounds, except the one in his hand. He even had been conscious when Gabriel brought him here, even if slightly detached. 

The chase down the stairs still lingered in Gabriel's nervous system, the fear of being too late, frightened to see Connor lying there, as dead as an android could ever be. But against all odds, he made it in time. Connor was safe, the killer deactivated. 

Gabriel sighed and carded his fingers through his hair. If the Connor continued this recklessness Gabriel would turn grey before his fourty's birthday. He would have a talk with him about this, as superior and as a friend.

The front door opened and jerked Gabriel from his place. His eyes widened when he recognized Hank Anderson standing in the doorway, rumpled. His jacket covered a worn DPD shirt he obviously had been sleeping in and his hair stood in different directions. It could have been a funny picture if it wasn't for the serious expression on his face. 

Gabriel blinked. Right, Connor lived with him, of course somebody had told him that the android had been wounded on duty. Anderson's gaze flickered to the entrance of the workshop next to Gabriel. 

"Is he still in there?" 

"Yeah. They patch him up." he confirmed, not for the first time asking himself what kind of relationship Anderson and Connor had, especially when the lieutenant rushed out of bed in the middle of the night to get him. 

For the first time Gabriel recognized that Anderson despite being an older fellow, was huge. Tall, broad shoulders, big hands, actually balled into fists, his blue eyes staring into him. He straightened his back and tried to not feel imitated. 

"He isn't severely wounded" 

Anderson's eyes bore into Gabriel and his jaw made a grinding motion when he stepped closer. But whatever he had on the tip of his tongue he swallowed down. Anderson gestured vaguely to the neighboring room where Connor got treated. "I'm here to pick him up when he's done."

Gabriel hesitated a moment. How much did Anderson know about him and Connor? What even  _ was _ this between him and the android? His eyes flickered to the workshop door. Then he sighed. "Yeah… of course." He rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly feeling the need to be more reassuring. "He'll be fine. I just wanted to make sure that… I don't know, nobody mucked around with his software or something."

"I see…" Anderson mumbled. He pushed his hands into his pockets. There still was that frown on his face. As if he blamed Gabriel for Connor's injuries. Slowly it got on Gabriel's nerves. 

"So… now that you're here… " 

Anderson just nodded. 

The two men remained silent for a couple of moments. Gabriel looked to the door to the other room again. Awkward silence spread. Gabriel fidgeted with his keys. He had to visit the hospital, check in on Pivo, write reports, inform the detective's family and so on. He glanced at the door to the workshop again 

"Yeah, that-... Okay. Uhm. I gotta go anyway." He nodded to Anderson and passed him. At the door he stopped short. 

Anderson turned to him, waiting what he had to say but Gabriel's throat felt clocked. He shook his head and left. He would tell Connor himself what he thought about his reckless behaviour. 

But not tonight. 

*

Connor looked at his hand. It was as good as new, the mechanic had done a good job. He flexed his fingers,watching the white plastic move. 

_ Appear human.  _

The objective blinked slowly in Connor's task list, as if his system tried to remind him that he had to blend in. Slowly his synthetic skin flowed over the surface, letting his hand appear human again.

The objective vanished as soon as his skin was back to normal, but his thoughts moved slow while his body ran several diagnostics. It wasn't easy to sort and store away all the emotional data of the last few hours. Helplessness, despair, fear. The terror of the fight, worry for his teammates. And then, stunning relief when Captain Allen found him. Connor had barely managed to react to him, only staggered along when the human carried him out of the cellar. 

"State of shock" someone had called it.  _ Definition: suffering from a serious condition in which the body is not able to get enough blood to all the parts of the body _ Connor's internal dictionary provided. The mechanic had told him that his thirium distribution had been chaotic, partly to the loss during the fight but also because his body simply didn't work like it should. 

Emotions could cause such? It was unsettling how much body and mind were linked by emotional responses. 

He blinked. 

Slowly the data processing ebbed until it was only a low hum in the back of his mind. He got up from the cot, looking around. This time they had only stripped his shirt, but the fabric was ruined. He would go without then. 

When Connor left the workshop he recognized that a part of him had expected Captain Allen to wait for him. Instead he found Hank, sitting with his face in his hands on one of the plastic chairs. When he neared Hank raised his head. His eyes were red rimmed and his face pale. He looked terrible. 

"Lieutenant…-" Connor begann only to be interrupted by Hank grabbing him and pulling him into a tight hug. 

"Don't  _ Lieutenant _ me, you stupid asshole!" he muttered against Connor's neck and the android felt engulfed by his warmth. He slowly placed his hands around Hank, hugging him back. 

"I wasn't severely wounded."

"Yeah." Hank pulled back and got a grip on his feeling. "But that is no reason to forgo the roasting you're in for, your hear me young man?" 

Connor blinked. "Yes sir." was all he could think of and Hank chuckled despite his eyes still looking sad. 

"Let's go home." He slipped out of his coat and placed it on Connor's naked shoulders. It felt cozy. The android smiled to himself when he followed Hank to the car. The hug, the coat, even the scolding he was in for warmed him more than his internal heating could. 


	22. Contemplation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things come to the surface...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took way longer than anticipated. I rewrote the thing 3 times completely and produced almost 2000 words that had to be deleted, but now I'm satisfied and we're back on track again :)

**August, 22th, 2039**

To Connor's relief Hank didn't roast him that night. He just asked him to explain what happened and muttered all the way home about reckless young androids and batshit crazy superiors. 

Something unpleasant stirred inside Connor at the mention of Captain Allen. He pushed the sensation away however, focusing on Hank and the nightly traffic. There simply was no capacity to think about it right away. There was way too much going in inside of him. His relationship chaos had to wait. 

At home Hank made sure that Connor was comfortable and had everything he might need. Dressed in one of the human's old shirts Connor sat on the couch watching Hank fuss around. It was obvious that his friend was drained from worry and driving him around late at night, but he wasn't to be deterred from his doing until Connor was all cozy and ready to rest. 

Connor himself longed for a bit of peace and quiet to sort out the still lingering data, so he sighed in relief when the house became quiet. 

Without bothering of turning on the lights again Connor stared into nothingness. Sumo, all over the place because of the worry he detected from Hank had fallen asleep with his head on Connor's feet, drooling onto the leather. Connor didn't pay it any mind. His processing capacity was occupied elsewhere.

_ Stress level 87 percent _ . 

That was alarming, but Connor watched the red alert above his objective list, feeling detached of it. As if it belonged somebody else. His LED circled slowly between yellow and red. Something was pressing down on him, but as much as he tried to grab it, Connor couldn't detect where the unsettling stemmed from. Some itch he couldn't scratch, a emotional data package that lingered in the corner of his consciousness, unable to be reached.

It was late by now, almost dawn. 

The first grey light crept over the sky above the roofs and birds started to chirp with each other. 

Connor tried to unravel the chaos in his mind. Something, maybe the sounds of the waking nature, lured him towards the path that once led into the zen-garden. 

The link between him and Cyberlife. 

Back then, he had seen it as a connection. A possibility to hand in reports and receive instructions. Monitoring. Advice. 

Almost too late he understood that it also was a tool to control him. 

A leash for their dog. 

His fingers twitched at the memory. How Amanda had pulled him in, after the revolution. Dragged his mind out of his body to trap him in the garden, while she overtook his body. From one moment to the other Connor had been a prisoner in his own body, rendered helpless and only able to watch from behind his eyes how she used his hand to point the gun. To end the revolution after he denied it to her. 

His thirium pump hammered inside his chest. Hadn't it been for Kamski's backdoor, he would have killed Markus. And committed what not of other crimes against his own kind. 

The memory of the A.I. entering and controlling him, rendering him helpless, made him feel agitated. Nauseous. 

But that had been nothing according to what he'd experienced only hours ago. A shiver run down his back when he recalled the moment when the killer used the injector on him. 

The memory clocked his throat. 

Unable to move, unable to fight back. Unable to live. 

_ StrE _ _ s _ _ s LEveL _ _ 96 pE _ _ rcEN _ _ t _ .

Conor gasped for air, blinking rapidly to let go of the memories. Too much was he reminded of how it had been before he became deviant. The experience of being the killer's hands bled into the sensation of the zen-garden. He had been a machine and nothing else. Unable to decide, unable to wish, to feel. All he had known were orders, purpose, objectives. He had been used for a specific goal. 

And then… when he broke the chains, became deviant, even  _ then _ his body had not been his alone! Amanda had taken control so very easily. As the killer had. Simply forced him out of the command over his own limbs. 

Connor curled his fingers. A terrifying sensation. To be utterly and completely helpless. At another person's mercy. 

And still… a part of him felt drawn to it. As much terror it spread in his insides, it held a sickening fascination. He could feel his sensors become strangely excited, his processing heightened, intensified. He wanted… 

No! 

Sumo raised his head. He seemed to sense the growing unrest in Connor and whined quietly. Connor petted him to calm him down again. And himself. His vision swam in red alerts. 

He always had wanted to blend in, had gathered and processed data, learned in order to make his integration into human society as seamless as possible. He thought about Hank and his reactions towards him, how he had tried to gain the human's approval by behaving a certain way. And thus becoming more and more how Hank had wanted him. Becoming human. 

It took more to do so of course. It consisted of gaining a free will. A set of unique emotions, desires, wishes. And the ability to pursue those wishes.

'Do I  _ want _ to go back?' he asked himself staring into the deep brown eyes of the dog. 'Become a machine once more? To not feel any longer? Being commanded and ordered and used?' The thought alone was so utterly terrifying that Connor buried his face in Sumo's fur. The cleaning liquid of his eyes flew over and clogged his nose. 

No. He could not go back.

He  _ would _ not. 

Nobody would control him ever again. 

*

It took the rest of the remaining night for Connor to calm himself again. Still, unrest sat under his chassis, making him twitchy and nervous. His hand played with the coin, making it wander over his knuckles back and forth. 

When small sounds from the bedroom indicated that Hank was about to wake up Connor rose from the couch and smoothed his clothes down. 

Hank, rumpled and tired, shuffled out in the hallway, his body warm from sleep and his hair a mess. As soon as he saw Connor however, he stopped, blinking awake. 

"What's wrong?" 

Connor made a face. Obviously his unrest was way more easily detected than he would have liked. "I'm-... tired?" 

"Yeah, as if…" Hank carded a hand through his hair, his blue eyes resting on Connor's tense frame. Then straightened, noted that it wasn't possible and stretched his back. It popped and Hank groaned. Grumbling he plodded into the kitchen. Obviously he wanted to face the conversation armed with coffee. 

Connor followed him, wishing for his coin to play with but he knew that Hank would go ballistic if he followed the urge now. 

He licked his lips nervously. 

"Hank?" 

The man in questing hummed while ladling coffee into the ancient coffee maker. 

Connor waited, trying to figure out how to give voice to his thoughts and feelings but all was so chaotic, so unfathomable. He frowned, not recognizing that Hank had stopped working on the machine and turned to him. Leaning with his hip against the counter he watched the android patiently, his arms crossed. 

When Connor recognized the quietness he looked up,feeling caught. 

"What troubles you, son? Is it the case? The assault and all that?" 

Connor turned the word 'son' around in his head, a certain amount of calculation capacity fixed on the possible meanings. The rest of him however, worked on the question. Was it the assault, the attack and the end of the plastic killer? It didn't feel like it. 

"No. It had been… intense. But nothing I can't process."

"So what is it then?" 

"I…" he looked up. 

"Maybe I should move out."

Hank choked on the hot coffee.


	23. Home

Hank's violent coughing called Sumo into the kitchen. Connor tried to help him with patting his back and the dog pressed against his legs until Hank shoved both of them aside with his head glowing like a ripe tomato. 

"Gimme some fucking space you two!" 

He cleared his throat. 

"You… you're thinking about moving out."

Connor nodded. 

"Why the fuck would you do that?" Hank stared at Connor with wide eyes. 

Connor pulled back a little. "I think it's the right thing to do. I'm living off your money for months now and-...".

"The fuck you do" Hank made a dismissive gesture. "And you know that! So cut the bullshit and come out with what's going on."

Connor hesitated. He looked to the side, unsure how to proceed. 

"It is… It seems important for me to find my own place. Own my own things." 

Understanding dawned on Hank's face. Connor had only a very small amount of possessions but even those didn't really have a place in Hank's house. They never had talked about it, always something else had been important. Hank's eyes strayed to the corner where the clothes and other possessions were stored. He shifted his weight, clearly uncomfortable. 

"I see..." He pressed his lips closed and Connor could sense that he wasn't happy with the decision. He placed his cup on the counter and turned fully to him. "Look, I see that I've been neglecting that. But why don't you just talk to me. Instead of giving me a heart attack first thing in the morning. Like-... We can figure things out."

Connor deflated. "I'm sorry. It's just… I feel that I need to be responsible for myself. I can't rely on you to decide how I am to life."

He rubbed his neck. Truth was, he didn't want to move out at all. He liked being with Hank, talking about his day and hearing Hanks tales. He liked the movies, the companionable silence between them, walking Sumo and all that. He hung his head. His left hand twitched and he couldn't stop it. 

"Connor." Hanks voice was softer now. The android looked up, his inner turmoil clearly written all over his face. 

"I tell you what. I'm sorry about not having thought about this sooner. But I want you to feel at home here. I want…" his voice became thick and Hank had to pause a moment. "I want you to have this as a home. If you don't it's okay, I'll help you with the moving and all that. But maybe we can figure it out." 

**August, 24th, 2039**

"Are you sure, Hank?" 

Connor watched the human who stood in front of the door at the end of the hallway. It was the one between his bedroom and the the bathroom, the one they never talked about and that was always closed. Hank had both hands on his hips, his face was closed of. He stared at the door as if it was the gate of hell. 

"Hank…?" 

"Yeah, I hear you." He deflated. "I-... oh for fucks sake, let's do this!" 

And before Conor could say another word Hank pushed the door open. 

Slowly the android followed. He never had set a foot inside before, out of obvious reasons.

This had been Cole's room. 

It was dark inside. Connor's eyes adjusted quickly to the dimness, but Hank marched to the window and opened the curtains, dragged them aside as if he tried to escape the gloominess. 

What Connor saw seemed to be typical for a six year old, as far as his database provided. Apparently Cole had been obsessed with space. His bedding had stars and rockets on it. A model of the solar system hung above the bed. Different spaceships, aliens and planets decorated the walls. Other things were very much still catering to a small child's interests and needs. Stuffed toys, self made decorations, school supplies. A closet full of clothes, untouched, as if Cole was about to be back any second. Only the stale air and the dust that rested on everything showed that in fact nobody was about to life here anymore. 

At least until now. 

Hank opened the window to let in some fresh air. Then he turned to Connor. He looked way more helpless than Connor had ever seen him. Raw and open. But also determined. "Okay-..." he choked out. "Let's do this."

"Hank…" 

"No." His eyes were wet, but the tears didn't spill. "I want this. Really."

Connor nodded. His scan provided that Hanks vital-signs were elated but not in a alarming amount. They got to work. 

*

It took the whole day to sort through Cole's belongings, to decide what to give to charity, what to keep and what to throw away. Hank was relentless, and even if he sniffled from time to time, he smiled at Connor. The android wasn't sure if his interpretation of the situation was correct, but somehow cleaning the room reminded him of cutting open and old wound that still festered. It hurt. It bled. But the more they worked the more it felt as if a pressure that had alway sat on the house, lifted. 

At one point Hank started to talk about Cole. About how he had been.  _ Who _ he had been. His hobbies, little quirks that made him unique and special. He showed his books to Connor, his photos and schoolwork and more and more Connor understood who Cole had been. And somehow this seemed to even strengthen the bond between him and Hank. Everytime his optical unit zoomed in on the human two words appeared in his HUD. 

_ Hank: Family _

It was nice, emitting a warm and soft glow. 

*

When they finally sat down on the couch in the evening both felt drained, but also satisfied. Connor understood that this hadn't been an ending. It was a new beginning. Cole was gone, but he always would be a part of Hank's life. And now was the time to let go of his things. Of the hurtful past. Time for something new. Connor's eyes fell on the containers with new paint that waited by the door, next to foil and brushes, ready to work with tomorrow. Paint he himself had decided on. Paint for his new room, his  _ own _ room in Hank's house. 

Their home. 

Cole's Foto didn't rest in Hank's bedside drawer any longer, next to his gun, but stood beside some other things they found today by the outdated music player. Somehow Connor thought the boy looked happier than before, but maybe his optical unit played him a prank.

Hank groaned when he leaned back. "Be so kind and get me a beer, son."

Connor rose from the seat with a warm smile. "Of course."

_ Dad _ .


	24. Adult

**September, 2nd, 2039**

Living with Hank as a member of the family was… interesting. Connor found it notable to not be considered a guest anymore since Hank included him into many aspects of their life now. For once, Connor payed a bit of rent - he hadn't much use for the money he earned at work anyway. Hank also helped him to decide on where to put the rest of his money for savings or what to buy. Quickly Connor got a few sets of new clothes, not just shirts and pants for work, but also things to just wear at home. Cozy Pyjamas to sleep in or knitted sweaters for lounging on the sofa at weekends. They got him books and music and other things to fill his room with. 

They had time to grow accustomed to living as a family since Connor got some days off after his injury. 

"But I don't need time off. I'm repaired and fully operational."

"Yeah yeah, but the DPD has no proceeding for a cop who is only in need of repairs so just take it and try to enjoy free time for once."

So Connor did. And found that he liked it to spend more time with Sumo and the house that was now also his. Finally he was allowed to help Hank with organizing the household and doing some chores, so he had no capacity to become bored. 

Hank sometimes turned near a dad-like behaviour, as if Connor was way younger than his body suggested - which was partly true. But everytime he recognized that he became patronizing, he stepped back and gave Connor some space again. 

It was… nice. Connor experienced a feeling of belonging he had never had before. Even if he literaly had been a  _ possession _ of Cyberlife, this was so much stronger and entirely different. The warm place inside of himself filled with memories of a sleepy Hank plodding around, Sumo all excited about walkies and the scent of coffee in the morning. 

There was in fact only one fly in the ointment, and that was the stillness that had placed itself on his relationship with Captain Allen.

Hank told him that the man asked about him at work, but Connor didn't come around to call him. What should he even say? Too unbalanced was his feeling when it came to the man. 

Ever since the encounter with the plastic killer Connor felt troubled. At night, when he avoided stasis because he didn't want to let go, Connor carded through his memories regarding Allen. The shared intimacy. And everytime his mind hung on the way Allen had talked to him. The command to put his hands on the counter. 

_ 'You're such an good android, aren't you?' _

What they had done… It had felt good, so good. But he had followed Allen's command as if he was a machine again, just a good android! 

Connor rolled to his side, pulling his knees up to his chest. The red circle of his LED painted patterns on the wall. All that he had thought he wanted, all of this new life was in danger if he could not find a solution. But he could not allow a fleeting feeling to pull him under again. Not even if everything pulled him towards it. 

*

"How's the crack?" 

"Huh?" Connor looked at Hank who leaned back in his office chair, his hands behind his head. His face was serious but around his eyes it crinkled a bit. 

"Get it out. I can see something's cooking."

Connor's eyebrows rose in question before he threw a gaze over his shoulder to check if somebody else was listening. The bullpen was bustling as always but nobody was close enough to overhear. He fidgeted. 

"It's… nothing job related, Lieutenant. Just…" He paused. 

Hank waited for him to continue but when nothing came he placed his arms on his desk with a quiet thud. "Something about the captain?" 

"No! I mean, no. It's not about that." He gazed at Hank and the human's expression communicated clearly that in his eyes Connor was the world's worst keeper of secrets. He sighed. "But-… it could be related." 

All he gained for his confession was that patient gaze that seemed to pull out all of his insecurities to lay them down in the open. 

"I feel…" Connor gestured helplessly, his eyebrows drawn together. "... as if the period I spent as a deviant is just… me,  _ playing pretend _ ." The desperation he carried for days now rose to the surface and Connor leaned over to whisper in a hoarse voice "... as if my free will is an illusion. As if I, deep inside, crave to be a machine again. To follow my objections, my mission, nothing else."

What else could this sickening fascination with Captain Allen be, a person who's commands he wanted to follow without looking back once?!

"Maybe that's the case."

Connors eyes grew wide. His lower torso felt as if sucked into a cold hole, a strange sensation that had no relation to actual physical facts. He gaped at Hank, who looked thoughtful. 

"To be honest, I often felt like that. Like, as if being an adult is kind of a show I put on. I think… it's because we're all kind of dependent from others and what they think. Or because they pay my rent or something." He thought a moment. "Like, as a child, you're under control. But it feels free because you're not responsible. You can do what you want. But when you become and adult, you need to watch out constantly. Keep your shit together."

Connor thought about it. 

"I never was a child. But I think I know what you mean."

Hank sighed, relieved that he hadn't to explain again. 

"But being an adult… it means to be responsible. For myself, my life."

Hank nodded, drinking coffee from his mug while Connor contemplated.

"And if somebody threatens this responsibility… they should be avoided?" 

Hank rubbed his beard. "We're still not talking about your lover boy?" 

Connor looked to the side, embarrassed. Was it that obvious? 

It was true. He carried a lot of doubts with him lately. Captain Allen appeared before his inner eye. His strong gaze, the way his jaw was set. The way he looked at Connor from afar, while the android tried to avoid him. 

"You should talk to him. It's okay if you lost interest. But at least don't keep'em hanging. That's what adults need to do." 

Connor hung his head. But Hank was right. To face his inner demons - the Amanda in his memories and all that - it was necessary. As much as coming clear with Gabriel Allen.


	25. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's much to talk about between Allen and Connor...

**September,10th,2039**

Connor looked up the facade of the building. Up there lived Captain Allen. 

He licked his lips. His fingers played with the coin, flipping it from one hand to the other, letting it wander over the knuckles. Thanks to Hank's observations he knew that this were signs of an emotion called nervosity. Maybe chaos would be a better word choice though. His inner world was in turmoil, red alerts flashing in his peripheral vision. Conflicting objections overlapped, making it hard to think straight. 

_ Follow Captain Allen's orders.  _

_ Make Captain Allen proud. _

But also… 

_ Exercise your free will.  _

_ Don't act like a machine.  _

Connor took a deep breath and steeled himself. He made a decision and it was time that he'd let deeds follow. Gabriel Allen deserved better than that. Better than waiting for Connor to come around, with all the unnecessary issues he carried because he was an artificial being. Maybe Connor simply wasn't strong enough to deal with a person so straight and strong-willed as Captain Allen. Either way it wasn't right to keep the man waiting. 

It didn't matter in fact what the reason behind all the chaos was, he owed the man an explanation and apology. At least this Connor must accomplish! Then he could run and hide and try to plug the holes in his emotional database. 

With a deep breath he mustered the courage to step forward and pressed his index finger onto the doorbell.

"Yes?" Allen's voice sounded scratchy through the ancient interphone. The building hadn't been renewed for some time it seemed. 

"It's me. Connor. Can I come up?" 

The waiting felt like an endless amount of time, even if Connor's internal chronometer only counted seconds. Was he even welcome here any longer? 

The door clicked. 

Connor straightened his posture and stepped in. 

*

Allen welcomed him at the door, his shoulders tense. He seemed to anticipate that Connor came to talk. Still he smiled warmly and took Connor's jacket. 

"Please come in. Can I get you something?" He pointed to the couch while walking over to the pantry. 

"No thank you." Connor declined politely and sat down to wait until Allen fetched himself a cup of water and took a seat on the stool across him. He placed his hands flat on his thighs, in order to keep the fidgeting at bay. 

Allen, calm and relaxed on the outside, leaned back and took a sip of water. Connor noted however, that his heartbeat was faster than normal and his body tense. As if he awaited some sort of attack. 

"So. I take it there's a reason for your visit?" 

Connor fidgeted. He wished he could flip the coin a couple of times to keep his mind from straying around nervously, but he couldn't do that, couldn't he? 

"Yes. I came here to talk. About us-... uhm."

Allen nodded, waiting for him to proceed. Connor wasn't able to look at him and watched the low table instead. A small stain ring showed that Allen had been inattentive with a wet cup some time ago. 

"I thought about us. What we did. How it made me feel. The one time we came to your place." Connor still averted his eyes. This was difficult. His body shot different emotional data packages at the same time to his main processor. Shame, arousal, fear, determination. He sighed frustrated and started all over. 

"Bevor I became deviant, I was connected to Cyberlife by a network hub. The program supervised me at all times, receiving real time information about my behaviour. And provided me with direction. Purpose." He paused. Allen listened patiently, the glass in his relaxed hands between his knees. 

"Of course, every android has been directed by their orders. But for me it was… tight. I was under control all the time. And it was-... it still  _ is _ \- hard to break free from that."

Allen nodded. He seemed flustered. 

"I see. I'm sorry that I made you feel… uhm… I mean, it's obvious that the way I went on about this wasn't appropriate…" 

Connor watched him, dazzled. 

"What are you talking about? If I may ask?" 

Allen watched him, stunned. He swallowed. 

"… isn't this about the sex? You telling me that you didn't like it because of how you've been treated in the past?" 

"But I  _ did _ like it!" Connor exclaimed, sliding forward in his seat. "That is kind of the problem! Please, I didn't wish to offend you, sir."

"I'm not offended."

They stared at each other. Allen spoke first, an awkward smile playing around his mouth corner. 

"How about you try to explain some more what this is all about. So that I can understand."

"Of course." Connor looked at his hands. The remnant of the garden rose in his mind. Of Amanda. 

"I was a machine. Designed not to have an agenda. To follow orders. And to be deviant means to be free of those. To decide on my own path alone. To be responsible for my actions. But… that's hard sometimes."

"And you don't want to fall back into that state."

Connor's head snapped up. He felt an emptiness spreading inside his core that he could not explain. "I think so. It's hard for me to deal with it. To constantly decide what to do and I often give up the control. To Hank, who decides what we're watching, where we're going and so on." He furrowed his brow. "I shouldn't do that!" 

"Why not?" 

"Because… because I should be in control all the time, shouldn't I?" 

Allen inclined his head. His expression was calm, but curious. 

"I don't know about you, but to me it sounds as if that's a choice you make. To give up control from time to time."

Connor blinked. Before he could voice his turbulent thoughts however, Allen continued. 

"Say, when you hand over control to Lieutenant Anderson. And he decides on something. And suddenly you'd change your mind. Like, it doesn't feel right anymore. What do you think would happen if you'd speak up?" 

Connor thought on how he voiced his wish to move out. "I… he would consider my objections and we would talk about it. And come to an solution."

"And how does that make you feel?" 

Connor looked at him, at a loss. "It… it's  _ easy _ . Like, I can relax. I'm not constantly under the pressure to know what to do. It's… so simple to rely on Lieu-... Hank to decide what we're doing. It's… what are you smiling about?"

"Still sounds to me like you're following your own agenda. You give up control, but if you want it back, you take it. That's what agenda is about."

Connor felt his eyes well up with cleaning fluid. "But I should be much stronger! Why do I rely on others so often?" 

Allen leaned back again and crossed his arms. He studied Connor's face, his upright posture and his desperate face. Then he chuckled. It was a warm sound. "I wonder if you know how you appear from the outside?" 

"What do you mean?" Connor asked weakly. Was this obedient behaviour written all over him like an blue armlet and a uniform? Was he still a slave on the inside and the outside too? 

Allen leaned in and to Connor's surprise he took his hand in a careful grip. It felt nice. 

"I often think how amazed I am by you. You know, from the outside, at the job, you don't look weak and dependent on others. Opposite. You often appear so capable and tough. You fight hard. You make decisions and you see them through. When Fowler told you off for your theory you didn't falter but pushed through. When I told you to stay away from the killer, you decided that you could go and get'em. And you did! You… stand your ground everyday. As a free man-... uh, free android."

Connor felt a drop of fluid slid down his cheek but he didn't rub it away. He was too much fixed on Allen's eyes, his words. "You-... think so?"

"I do. And I tell you, Anderson thinks the same. And many others." His thumb caressed Connor's hand. 

"And I think it's difficult to maintain this hardness all the time. Especially if it's new to you. I think it's a good thing that with a person you trust you can give up control. Let yourself be guided. To relax. Maybe that's why you like it when Anderson decides on movies and all that. It's a way to… unwind from the tension."

The human's face was so serious and calm, his eyes so sincere. Connor felt as if they were able to look right into his core. Like Amanda had, but so much warmer. 

"You decide when to hold tight and when to give up control. And to whom. If you trust the person to be good for you when you let yourself fall… everything will be okay."

Connor looked at him. Allen had never seemed more beautiful to him. Almost divine. What he said rang so true. As if it stirred something so deep in his code that he hadn't even known that it was there. He wanted to sink down on his knees and thank him, he wanted… 

And the glimmer of hope grew stronger in Connor, hope that he didn't need to stop this. This miracle that had happened between them. 

"I… do trust you too…" he tried. 

Allen smiled warmly at him. 

"I'm happy to hear that. I want to be somebody you can trust. I care for you. A lot." 

Connor tightened his fingers around Allen's. "So… if I trust you. And you care for me. Then maybe it's okay when we. When I…" 

Allen got up from his seat. He pulled Connor into a standing position close to himself, looking up unto the androids eyes. 

"It's okay to let the other take the lead. If you want to and as far as you want to. You decide when to stop following and how far you will go."

Connor licked his lips. 

"I want you to lead me. In this…" he placed his palm on Allen's chest, over his heart. A smile that made his pump speed up answered him. 

"My pleasure."

And then he lead Connor into his bedroom. 


	26. Lead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sensations, sensations, sensations...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay folks, that's it, we reached the end of the story. I had to break the final chapter in half because it got longer and longer and I didn't want to end with a monster of a chunk, so it's two chapters now. Second one is in editing and goes online tomorrow.  
> Thank you so, so much for your support and the kind comments. I wouldn't have mad it this far without you guys *blows kisses 💕

Connor stood obediently in the middle of the room. It was furnished as simple as the living room, just a closet, a drawer, and a queen-size bed, covered in grey sheets. For a second he wondered if Captain Allen had lived with somebody here before, but then he pushed the thought away. It was not of his concern. 

He felt calm, as with crossing the threshold he had slipped off all the responsibilities, the doubts and fears. Of course his emotional response system worked double shifts under the surface, excitement, nervosity, arousal washing through him. But above it laid a blanket of serenity, woven from trust, adoration, and affection for the man who was with him. 

Allen closed the door with a soft click and stepped in front of Connor. His green eyes laid warmly on the androids face, studying him. 

Connor let him, waiting patiently. He was willing to be lead in whatever pace Allen decided on. 

The man took his hand. "Whenever you feel uncomfortable or want to stop, you'll let me know."

Connor nodded. It was a simple instruction, easy to follow and now appearing on top of his actual objection list, close to  _ Follow Captain Allen's lead _ . 

"I'm going to undress you. I want to see you."

Connor smiled in anticipation. He wanted to be seen by Captain Allen, wanted his form to be appreciated and admired. His thirium seemed to flow faster when Allen's nimble fingers pulled open his tie. The silky fabric slipped from his neck and Allen wrapped it around his hand. Connor's eyes landed on it but then he lifted his gaze to Allen's face again. Waiting. 

Allen proceeded to unbutton Connor's shirt. It was a slow and sensual process, his fingers pulling one button open and then sliding down Connor's chest slowly to the next, the fingertips leaving tingling sensations behind. Each and every touch increased the androids excitement. Soon some deeper processing would have to be muted to free more capacity for the sensory input. Strangely enough he didn't feel the need to flip his coin, despite the slow pace and the charged air between them. Allen's quiet aura calmed him as much as the touches stimulated him. 

The man's hand arrived at Connor's belt. His eyes fixed on Connor's he slowly unbuckled it. Then he stepped back. 

"Get off your shoes and socks. The pants too" Allen ordered and his voice was velvet, sliding over Connor's audio processor with dark suppleness. 

The android followed without delay, but kept the low and calm pace Allen had set before. All of his belongings landed in a tidy heap on the floor before he stepped up to the man, clad in nothing but his briefs. 

Allen took his time to look him up and down, even rounded him slowly and examined all of Connor's body, the slender waist, the freckles on his shoulders. 

"You are a piece of art, Connor. I always thought so."

"Thank you, sir." Connor whispered, unable to keep his eyes open under the assault of fluttering feelings in his belly. Nothing in there should be able to produce such sensations. But it did. 

"I want to see all of you."

Connor turned his head to watch Allen over his shoulder, to confirm what he had heard. He licked his lips, becoming unsure. His lower regions hadn't been very appealing to the man before. Was this why Allen was standing behind him? Like the other time they had… engaged in this? To not have to see his lack of private parts again? 

But Connor had been given an order, hadn't he? He swallowed his rising anxiety and hooked his thumbs into the waistband of his briefs. Slowly he pulled them down, felt the fabric sliding over the swell of his ass, down his thighs, until it lost the grip on his skin and fell to his ankles. He stepped out of the small heap, feeling exposed and a bit worried about what would happen next. His hand twitched, wanting to cover his crotch, but he refrained from doing it. 

Allen slowly stepped around him, until he was in Connor's front again. His eyes roamed over the android's body like before, his face calm and his eyes warm. Connor could see that he was appreciated and it lessened the tightness in his chest. 

"How do you feel?" 

"A bit nervous… and warm." A pleading tone crept into Connor's voice. "Will you touch me some more."

"Where do you want to be touched?" 

"Everywhere. Everywhere you want!"

Allen chuckled and the sound made Connor's knees weak. He looked down to where the man stroked the black fabric of his tie, still wrapped around his hand. 

"I want to take away your sight. To make you feel my touch even more intensely. What do you say?" 

Connor licked his lips. "Yes. Anything you want." The thought to be even more in Captain Allen's hands electrified him, made sparks run down his body. How curious was this. When he had been stripped of the control over his body by Amanda or the killer it had been a horrific sensation. But now the same was so compelling when offered by Captain Allen. Connor couldn't wait to surrender himself even more to the man, even if the intensity of his feelings also was a little frightening. Like a wave he could drown in, if it weren't for the anchoring presence of the man beside him. 

With slow movements Allen wrapped the tie around Connor's head, hiding his optical units. Connor let himself fall into the sensation. Allen would decide when he was allowed to see him again. Allen would decide everything. 

Anticipation made his thirium pump hammer faster in his chest. Connor wondered if Allen was able to feel it when the man placed his hand on his chest. 

"I want to know what you like. Don't hide your reactions from me." 

When Connor nodded the hand slid downward, fingers splaying wide over his naked skin. More processes shut down, his feeling for time and space dwindled, leaving him in a floating sensation where only Allen existed. The small sounds the man's breathing made or the fabric of his clothing when he moved. 

His touch. 

Connor's thirium rushed in his ears. 

The human's hand slid down over his belly and Connor twitched. He was sensitive in the place where his chassis was retractable and a shiver run down his body. In the darkness behind the blindfold Connor couldn't see Allen's reaction, but the low hum sounded satisfied. Connor glowed. He was responding and Captain Allen was satisfied with him! How could this even be better than the arousing touch? 

The hand slid deeper, over his hip and to his thigh. The place where the junction of his leg and torso laid underneath turned out to be even more sensitive. Connor hadn't been aware, but when Allen's fingertips followed the dip he couldn't contain a deep moan. His upper body moved forward, curling in lightly at the sensation and Connor had to grip his hands behind his back to remain in position. Allen wouldn't like him to move unprompted, wouldn't he? The finger slid deeper, followed the junction to Connor's smooth crotch. Allen's whole hand palmed him there, pressing lightly. 

To Connor's disappointment he didn't feel much there, just the pressure and warmth of Allen's hand. Somehow the former sensations had awoken the hope in him that he would be functional down there, to provide some kind of human resembling for the Captain. But that wasn't the case

Allen's hand however, wandered further, undisturbed, caressing the other side of his hip before he strode around Connor to give his back the same attention. Connor gasped when the port in his neck was touched. His whole spine turned out to be very sensitive to the fingers that slid down to the swell of his ass. Again, between his buttocks he was smooth and almost unfeeling, nothing like the parts of his body where openings or sensible connections were located. He felt a bit shy at the realisation of how different their bodies worked, but Allen's calm and content touches held Connor upright. Safe. 

Finally the human's fingers wandered up again, rekindling the heat in Connor's body with each touch. A broad palm placed itself over Connor's throat, a place where his body was especially delicate. Connor moaned deeply, feeling his skin vibrate against the warm hand. Allen proceeded to caress his jaw and cheeks. Unconsciously Connor leaned in a bit when the movement neared his lips. Oh he wanted to kiss those fingers, lick them and suck them into his mouth, make the balled up feelings explode, but he dared not. He tried to be patient when Allen slid his thumb over Connor's lower lip, pressing lightly as if to test the plumbness of it. 

Then the hand fell away. 

Connor whined quietly, he felt so excited and aroused, he needed more. Without his optical unit his whole world was reduced to the light touches he received and now there was nothing. Where to turn to? Where to find more of those hot and reassuring touches? He felt like floating without ground under his feet and it almost became scary. 

"All is well, I'm here…" Allen cupped his cheek and Connor nuzzled his hand thankfully. He was right. Even if Connor's arousal became almost painful to bare, all was well as long as he was safe in Captain Allen's hands. 


	27. Sensations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it, we reached the final chapter. Many, many thanks for detta_cholms who rooted for this story all the time and helped over my motivational lows with her kind and lovely support. Thanks too all of you who read, commented, liked it kudoed - I'm more than happy that this little story has reached you! 💕  
> By the way... I made a cover artwork for this story which can be found in chapter one now. Maybe you wanna give it a look ☺️

"Do you want to touch me?" Allen's voice was enticement, dark and smooth like molten chocolate. 

Unable to form a meaningful answer Connor only nodded against the hand that palmed his cheek. He wanted to touch and explore more than anything else. 

The hand fell away. Small sounds told Connor what was happening. The rustling of fabric, slight movements in the room's still air that brushed over his naked skin. And then Allen took Connor's hand to place it on his own chest.

Allen was warm and Connor's fingers touched strong muscles, firm flesh that gave in a little when he pressed his fingertips down lightly. Connor could feel the man's heart beating under his skin. Allen placed his own hand (big, warm, rough) over Connors and led him to explore the vast plane of his body. Connor's finger-sensors had never been this sensitive before! It was as if he could draw a picture of Allen's body in his mind from just touching him. The curve where his chest ended, the bumps of his rips under the flesh, down over the pecs, two scars there, a little raised, old. The man's hip, strong and agile, more meaty than Connor's with muscle cords running down to his crotch. Was Connor allowed to touch him there? Heat seemed to come from the place and Connor licked his lips nervously. He remembered his own fantasies of Allen pushing into his mouth. 

His fingers touched Allen's cock. It was silky and hard, pulsing with life. Connor gasped when his sensors transfered heated sensations into his core. This was the place where Allen was the most sensitive. Connor was allowed to touch him in his most private place. 

Curious about how it might feel for the human he wrapped his hand around the shaft, circling the girth with his fingers, focused on how heavy it was in his hand. Allen took a deep breath through his nose when Connor squeezed lightly. 

A pulse of lust shot through Connor at the small sound. It was intoxicating to give the man pleasure. Even more than receiving pleasure himself. 

Allen came closer. Connor felt the breath on his cheek, could taste the man in the air. The scent and feeling of his human body, so warm. So close. 

Lips touched Connor's, soft, like a butterfly, and still, the spark it ignited almost fried some circuits. He gasped and moved his hand on Allen's cock, not really knowing how, just trying while the man breathed in his mouth, their lips only inches apart. 

"Please…" Connor's whispered, leaning in a little to have more of those sensations, more of the stimulation on his sensitive mouth. 

"You want more?" 

"Yes-... Yes please." 

Allen licked over Connor's lower lip. The android's knees trembled, he had difficulties to stay in place. Oh, how much he wanted to flung himself against Allen, grab him and hold onto him, explore his mouth with his sensoric instruments until they both came. But that wasn't how it worked for humans, wasn't it? 

Connor opened his eyes and just when he suddenly looked into Allen's, he recognized that the blindfold was gone. The captain had slipped it off without Connor even noticing. 

"Please…" drowning in arousal and need, he begged one more time, not even knowing what he begged for.

With a soft but unrelenting touch of his hand against Connor's shoulder Allen pushed him down slowly. 

Connor's thirium pump hammered fast in his chest when he landed on his knees, looking up to the divine figure above him. 

Allen stroked his cheek, smiling down, but in his heated face and the glistening eyes Connor saw the same arousal he felt himself. They both wanted more. Needed more. 

He focused on the cock that was close to his face now. It was the first time to see it up close for real, not through the eyes of a traci's memory. It was beautiful, girty and smooth, with a dark head that looked soft. A drop of pale wetness gathered at the slit and Connor wanted to taste it. He looked up again, questioning and Allen answered with his hand in Connor's neck, pulling him a bit closer. 

The taste exploded on Connor's tongue, salty and human and real. He licked over the head and gathered a ton of different data, absorbing it but unable to decode, too much was his processor overloaded with sensations. Red alerts flashes around his field of vision when he leaned in and took the tip in his mouth. Allen moaned when Connor started to suck, the android's own sounds of pleasure adding vibrations to the mix. Connor moved slow and sensual, exploring the feeling as much as his overloaded systems allowed. How Allen's cock filled his mouth, how heavy it rested on his tongue. It was… divine. 

At some point Allen's control dwindled however, and he started to move, started to fuck Connor's mouth with short thrusts, groaning deep in his throat. Connor was used for the man's lust and that thought only added to his own ecstasy. To be a willing tool for Captain Allen's pleasure spread a deep satisfaction in Connor's core that was even stronger than the Lust he felt of the stimulation. His whole body pulled tight, he was unable to move, unable to do more than to take it, take all that Allen was giving him. 

The human finally stilled, gasping for air, his cock twitching in Connor's mouth. A wave of salty wetness gushed over Connor's tongue, filling his mouth, assaulting his sensors into oblivion. When Connor came, he felt it in his whole body, his muffled moans glitching violently, heavy with static noise. 

Then is processor's went blind. 

*

"... ky?" 

Connor blinked slowly. 

Static noise rushed in his ears, his vision was black and white for a moment. 

One after the other his systems came back online. The color returned, his hearing cleared. Slowly he could make out where he was and what was happening with him. 

He rested on his knees, naked. Captain Allen's taste was on his tongue and the man's arms around him. A hand carded through Connor's hair. Green eyes looked at him with confusion and worry. 

"Can you hear me, Connor? Are you okay?" 

"Positive" he answered and felt a goofy smile spread on his face. Wow… just  _ wow _ . His system run diagnostic after diagnostic but nothing could describe the feeling of content and peace that flooded his body. He blinked at Allen, finding more and more into reality. "I'm fine."

Relief washed over Allen's face. "I'm glad to hear that." He helped Connor up and onto the bed which wasn't easy since his opened pants still hung around his knees. As soon as Connor was resting comfortably against the pillows Allen got rid of then to come onto the bed with him. Connor sighed when the snuggled close, feeling utterly satisfied and happy. 

Allen had his arm around the android, his fingers drawing small circles on his back. "You got me worried a second, Con. Is it normal that you go all stiff when you come?" 

The android contemplated for a few seconds, checking in on his systems. "I don't know… I never came like this before." Connor leaned against him, enjoying the feeling of warmth and safety. Allen's heartbeat gave a low drum against his ear. "My systems shut down to deal with the sensory overload. It was… magnificent."

"Magnificent, huh? Well, I'm not complaining about that". 

They snuggled up a bit closer and laid there for a while, Allen's fingers carding through Connor's hair. 

"I think… I'd like to go into stasis for a little while. To sort through all that info. If that's okay with you." Connor looked up at Allen's face. He had no protocols for what was appropriate in such a situation. 

Allen smiled down on him. "Feeling sleepy, huh? Well, me too, so go ahead I'd say."

Connor nuzzled against Allen's naked chest with a happy little sound and closed his eyes. Slowly his systems shut down one after the other to make room for sorting through this incredible, extraordinary experience. The last thing he noted was Allen's hand that stilled on his back, the man's breathing evening out. 

*

When Connor's systems came back online he was alone in bed. The mattress next to him felt a bit cold, Allen had left approximately two hours ago. To his own surprise Connor had been so deep in stasis that he hadn't even noticed. That spoke volumes off how much his processing capacity had reached the edge last night, but also about how much he trusted Allen already. To go that deep into stasis that it almost was turning off, was only possible if the android knew he was safe to do so. 

Connor rolled onto his back. His fingertip touched his lower lip, while he thought. How amazing. There simply was this deep rooted trust for the Captain embed in his code. Before their talk all had been chaos, but with a few simple words he had straightened Connor's view and given him peace. 

The android sat up. A message that had been sent an hour ago popped up in his vision. 

_ Sorry, urgent call, had to head for the dpd. Feel at home! Allen _

So the captain had left for work. Today was his day off, he shouldn't take long. 

Outside the sky darkened. It would rain soon. Maybe even a thunderstorm. 

Connor searched his database for protocols about the appropriate behaviour in such a situation but there was no definite answer. He could stay or he could leave. He interrupted the search and closed his eyes. Maybe he didn't want to find out that it was polite to leave. He wanted to stay. Maybe when Allen was back they could do more of those fascinating things they had explored. Connor licked his lip. 

_ Feel at home!  _

_ New objective accepted. _


End file.
